Ancyent Odes and Fairy Rhymes

Just got caught up on all the recent poems. Top-notch stuff, Anon! And I for one thought the ending of "The Three Hobbits" was perfect.

Oh youuuuu.... You've always been a sweetie. I only hope Cinderfella gets his Prince!

Cinderfella


2


It was little known in all the Realm
-  not even in local Pimney -
Eldorion in his bower oft would say,
"I have the Poet Streak within me!"

Now on the very day of the
Pimney Gala Ball,
The Prince was versifying in his book
On his bower floor.

"Oh pray thee, of many things,
Have I dreamed and dreamt and pined,
But every day, and every night,
I wished another Poet to find.

A Poet both tall and sweet,
Pure and full of tact.
A Poet with the highest brow,
And not too much hair on his back.

A poet handsome and profound,
With pungent thighs and sexy eyes,
Someone both old and young,
Who loves both caviar and pies.

A Poet who has some vim and verve,
Perhaps, a potplant seller?
(By gosh, my friends, if I'm not wrong,
He was describing Cinderfella!!)





To be continued....

Heheheheee! Your turn!

"pungent thighs"

Cinderfella


3


Seven sinful step-siblings seriously
Contemplated their ballroom clothes,
While poor sweet Cinderfella
Had to tidy their drawers and robes.

"Oh how I'd love to go attend,
Prince Eldo's sparkling ball,
But I don't have a thing to wear,
Except these filthy overalls."

Now Cinderfella, that besmudged boy,
When all his chores were done,
Retired to the cottage garden,
Where he watched the setting sun.

"Oh if only I could go tonight,
And dance the waltz with Eldo,
I'm sure he'd fall in love with me,
For I'm not vain, or plain, or proud - Oh!

I'm not pompous nor an egotist,
And my thoughts are chastely pure,
No, I'm not like my step-siblings,
Whose minds are in the sewer.

And look! My thighs are succulent,
My hair flows like flowing silk,
And my body - where the sun has missed -
Is the hue of freshest milk.

How could a Prince like Eldo,
Not fall for a boy like me?
But alack! I won't be at the ball,
What an awful tragedy!

A tragedy for Prince Eldo, too,
And he will never know,
But sadly that appears just
The way this cruel world blows!"

But suddenly there was a flash,
And a lad in pink appeared,
His tutu bright and pretty,
His tiara many tiered.

"I am your Fairy Godboy,"
This apparition smiled and said,
"You may call me Blue,
Though I wear pink
Tho' nothing in my bed."

"Fairy Godboy?" Cinderfella gasped,
"Could this be my lucky day?
Will you grant my fervent wish,
Be warned, I cannot pay!"

"I've been sent here by Eru,
Who watches, Cinderfella,
For he loves his Chosen Few,
And His reach is interstellar.

And as you are such a good boy,
With your pure thoughts and all,
He has decided to let you go attend,
Eldo's Pimney Gala Ball."

"But all I have is overalls,
With no brush to brush my hair,
I can't attend the ball like this,
Alack! Oh woe! Despair!"

"You don't quite get the Godboy bit,
Fear not, Cinderfella,
When you see my wand you'll understand..."
"Hey, steady on, Blue fella!"

"A magic wand, you silly boy,
Soon your life will seem quite dreamy,
But before ever I can begin,
Have you got a big zucchini?"

"A fair to middling one," he blushed
- our Cinderfella chaste -
"It'll do the job, I'm pretty sure,
With nothing left to waste."

"Excellent. Go get it, boy,
And soon you'll have a carriage;
And then a dress, and curly hair,
And pretty soon a marriage."





To be continued....

Oh, I do so hope things work out for Cinderfella!

One would expect a happy ending in these classic Fairy Rhymes, Eldo, though with books like Game of Thrones truncating the happy ending market somewhat, I must confess, I'm squirming in my seat. And I mean 'squirming!'

4


Feeling fresh and nice - beautiful,
In his brand new party clothes,
Cinderfella sat at the sill,
As his step-siblings hit the road.

And, yes, they were resplendent,
Having picked with all due care,
Their sexiest accoutrements,
And briefest underwear.

Dave bedecked with vegetables,
That hung from coloured strings,
Carrots that seemed like penises,
And melons like other things.

Amarie had gone all nautical,
With her periscope in hand,
She knew how to sail the seven seas,
And satisfy a man.

Petty was in a skirt so fine,
Kilt-like in appearance,
Its hemline hoisted very high,
It could brook no interference.

Halfy went for science,
Mad experiments? He was no stranger!
And with Bunsen Burner at his side,
He provoked a sense of danger.

Julia was Countess Dracula,
She'd scare a Prince to love,
A masochistic man, I mean,
A compliant man, a dove.

Lancelot had greasy hands,
Having gave his Ford a lube,
Seeing that Prince Eldo was
A car-fanatic kind of dude.

Azriel sauntered forth,
With her skirt parted up the front,
And when she walked you could see,
Her thighs like Mallee stumps.

Powerful thighs, to squeeze a man,
Whether a monster or a runt,
No man had ever resisted,
Her sexuality so blunt.

No, any independent arbiter,
Could see her blatant stunt,
For sometime that night
She'd reveal her tasty tattoo.

For she had tattooed a depiction,
Of Prince Eldo on his hunts,
Hunting lasses in the woods,
And licking their sweet fresh toes.

For Eldo was a lusty prince,
In baseball terms - no bunts!
For he e'er swung his bat powerf'ly,
He'd pounded many moistened balls.

What dreadful competition!
How horrid! So potent!
But Cinderfella did not blanch,
For he believed in love devotent.

And even as he watched them all,
He felt a humble pride,
For he knew his clothes were beautiful,
Fit for a virgin bride.

His dress was long and lovely,
Of the purest ever white,
His shoes, high heeled and elegant,
His makeup - yes! - just right!

His hair, a delightful coiffure,
Clasped diamonds did complete,
His long and curly trusses,
His moustache slick and neat

"One last thing a'fore you go,"
His Fairy Godboy said.
"A good boy wears a chastity belt,
At least, until he weds."

"But in these modern times,
When sex is everywhere,
Won't it be a disadvantage,
If my bot is not kept bare?"

"Don't fall for that old chestnut,
Yes, folk say their minds are open,
But in his heart every man,
Wants an untouched boy for pokin'.

Especially on his wedding night,
A groom wants to be the first,
Now, down to your fairy-coach...
Oh! But have you got your purse?"

"Oh dear, I'm so excited..
Where is it? On here it is!
Is my lipstick as yet unsmudged?
Oh dear! I'm in such a dolly tiz!"

"Oh be off with you," Blue now said,
"You sexy ditzy duck!
But over here before you go,
And take a smoochy kiss for luck."





to be continued....

Don't you just love romantic fairy tales.

5


"Fancy having my Gala Ball,
On the same day I was born!"
Prince Eldo told his mother dear,
As they sunbaked on the lawn.

"Well, to find yourself a partner,
To live their life with you,
What better day to have this ball,"
His Mother gave her view.

"Oh what a lucky lass or lad,
Will have you in their chain,
You know, you'll never do anything,
As an individual again.

He or she will be there,
At every move you make,
When you sleep, when you wake,
When you walk, when you bathe.

It'll be like you have a shadow,
Your life won't be your own,
When yoy're working selling books,
They'll ring and ask:
'Why aren't you home?'

Imagine this, my dearest boy,
When you wake and turn your head,
There he'll be, or there she'll be,
A marital barnacle in your bed."

Imagine this, dear reader,
If all things go to plan,
Prince Eldo will be married;
Cinderfella will be his man!



To be continued....

Everyone loves a genuine fairy tale, 'tis said.