Re: Shannon

by **Orwell** Sun Aug 30, 2020 2:54 am

Mrs Figg wrote:yep indeedy we do. They all look the same hipster clone. Skinny tightest jeans with ankles showing, white tennis shoes or brogues, quiff, and bushy sculptural beard with no egg sandwich lingering in it. Fragrant and toned to perfection. maybe tattoos, maybe piercings, shoulder man-bag and designer shades. Called Jamie or Jack. Loves real ale and gastro-pubs, not keen on women even though heterosexual. Collects stuff like vinyl records, doesn't 'do' the countryside.

Perhaps those tight jeans suppress heterosexual urges?

by **Orwell** Sun Aug 30, 2020 2:57 am

Mrs Figg wrote:My problem is it seems to be they are hipsters or nothing. No Punks, Goths, New Romantics, New Wavers, Scallies, Surfer Dudes, Hippies, Soft Crusties, Hard Crusties, Rockers, Mods.
Just hipsters. maybe it is me and I am not longer able to identify youth movements...and these are just the White dudes.....the Black Dudes seem to have their own genres.

All fashions look the same after you get to a certain age. They don’t really, but you just lose interest or desire to see difference, just young people, who old people hate, of course, though we rarely admit it, it’s their youth we think they’re wasting, like some of us did, and we hate seeing other people make that mistake. Here to help.

by Mrs Figg Sun Aug 30, 2020 11:29 am

I like young people, I find them heart-warming and they give me hope for the future. Little girls will rule the world. Like Greta.

by halfwise Sun Aug 30, 2020 2:17 pm

I don't hate 'em. Except when I do things like try to take a ski lesson that's filled with kids who pick it right up as I'm falling on my face, then I hate'em.

But when I take myself out of competition I think they're quite lovely. And yes, little girls are the best. Little boys are mainly annoying.

by **Orwell** Mon Aug 31, 2020 1:16 pm

I twere joking... shucks.

by Mrs Figg Mon Aug 31, 2020 5:38 pm

Orwell wrote:I twere joking... shucks.

I know

I am familiar with the Orwellian humour by now. Wink

btw can you keep Tony Abbott out of the UK until he has given up wanting to be UK trade envoy Laughing

srsly we don't want him. Suspect

by **Orwell** Mon Sep 07, 2020 12:40 pm

Mrs Figg wrote:
Orwell wrote:I twere joking... shucks.

I know I am familiar with the Orwellian humour by now.

btw can you keep Tony Abbott out of the UK until he has given up wanting to be UK trade envoy srsly we don't want him.

No, no, no...be our guest. Keep him as long as you like. Forever is not too long. I promise.

by Mrs Figg Tue Sep 08, 2020 12:54 pm

Its too late, he is our new trade envoy. :facepalm:

by **Orwell** Fri Sep 11, 2020 11:17 am

Mrs Figg wrote:Its too late, he is our new trade envoy.

by Mrs Figg Fri Sep 11, 2020 2:32 pm

by **Orwell** Fri Sep 18, 2020 4:44 am

Mrs Figg wrote:

Not an unexpected reply...but he’s yours now, so one must adjust.

by Mrs Figg Fri Sep 18, 2020 11:42 am

by **Orwell** Fri Sep 18, 2020 6:45 pm

Of course, you could push him off a cliff, if you can find one. But I’m not suggesting that....

by Ally Fri Sep 25, 2020 1:02 am

Orwell wrote:Me, if I have to leave home, only stay at hotels.

Nearly believed you for a second lol

halfwise wrote:Not long ago I was in a cabin in the mountains above Santa Fe with an old friend and a typically cheerful young lass. Said CYL was somewhat put out at how juvenile middle aged men could be when with old friends, and we reminded her that we were her age when we met, and acting your age was a terrible trap. But for some reason young women want older men to act older and wiser, and we were having none of it. She's a Russian working for the UN, lives in Rome and spends half her time travelling to places like Zanzibar and Malaysia but frets her life is going nowhere. How little she knows she will look back decades later and realize these are her fullest years.

That's because older men are sexier as long as they have the appeal of maturity...but anyway, can you imagine? That sounds like the dream job (pre-COVID)!

by Pettytyrant101 Fri Sep 25, 2020 1:07 am

Ally wrote:That's because older men are sexier as long as they have the appeal of maturity

{{ Bugger! Well, Ive got the old bit down! Mad

}}

by halfwise Fri Sep 25, 2020 3:04 am

Maturity, phfui. The only real thing you gain as you hit real maturity is you become less judgemental on account of realizing how many things you royally screwed up attempting to make your way through life. (Unless you're Scottish).

by Pettytyrant101 Fri Sep 25, 2020 3:09 am

halfwise wrote:(Unless you're Scottish).

by Mrs Figg Fri Sep 25, 2020 5:12 pm

halfwise wrote:Maturity, phfui. The only real thing you gain as you hit real maturity is you become less judgemental on account of realizing how many things you royally screwed up attempting to make your way through life. (Unless you're Scottish).

When you are Scottish maturity means shitting down someone's chimney instead of directly on their pillows. It takes a lot of maturity and a barrel of buckie to do that.

by Pettytyrant101 Fri Sep 25, 2020 5:16 pm

{{ True!

'A Scottish householder returns home to find that some idiot had taken a shit down his chimney. Mike Williams is furious as the chimney had only just been cleaned.. Mike raged: “I was just getting home from work when a neighbour ran up and said they had seen a wee ned (Scottish for ruffian) shitting down the chimney. “He’s even taken a wee photo on his phone. When I open the door the smell was incredible. “The wee bastards’s shite had landed in the grate, it was all over the place! “It was all on the rug in front of the fire. There’s no way it’ll brush out. What the hell am i going to say to the insurance? ‘Och, a ned shat down the chimney’? “If I get my hands on the little bastard I’ll kick him so hard in the arse he’ll never sh*t again.” A source at Grampian Police said the crime was “Unpleasant and unusual”. }}}

by Mrs Figg Fri Sep 25, 2020 5:36 pm

“If I get my hands on the little bastard I’ll kick him so hard in the arse he’ll never sh*t again.”

by **Orwell** Fri Oct 30, 2020 5:28 am

Mrs Figg wrote:
halfwise wrote:Maturity, phfui. The only real thing you gain as you hit real maturity is you become less judgemental on account of realizing how many things you royally screwed up attempting to make your way through life. (Unless you're Scottish).

When you are Scottish maturity means shitting down someone's chimney instead of directly on their pillows. It takes a lot of maturity and a barrel of buckie to do that.

I have trouble climbing up onto roofs but nowadays, so it’s been back to pillows for me.

by **Orwell** Fri Oct 30, 2020 5:30 am

Ally wrote:
Orwell wrote:Me, if I have to leave home, only stay at hotels.

Nearly believed you for a second lol

halfwise wrote:Not long ago I was in a cabin in the mountains above Santa Fe with an old friend and a typically cheerful young lass. Said CYL was somewhat put out at how juvenile middle aged men could be when with old friends, and we reminded her that we were her age when we met, and acting your age was a terrible trap. But for some reason young women want older men to act older and wiser, and we were having none of it. She's a Russian working for the UN, lives in Rome and spends half her time travelling to places like Zanzibar and Malaysia but frets her life is going nowhere. How little she knows she will look back decades later and realize these are her fullest years.

That's because older men are sexier as long as they have the appeal of maturity...but anyway, can you imagine? That sounds like the dream job (pre-COVID)!

I have always been sexy, young or old. People are always calling me sexist.

by halfwise Fri Oct 30, 2020 12:25 pm

Never before realized the dangers of slipping an 'e' in and out.