Howdy from Needlehole
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Forumshire :: Other Topics :: Off-Topic
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by janesmith Wed Feb 16, 2011 8:07 am
While complimented by your attention, GB, I think it only right to let you know, I wasn't even there. Going by the rumours that I've heard, there was quite a bit of smoke in Odo's house at the time. (Pipeweed by all accounts. 
) You must have mistaken me for someone else who was there?:-Jane
) You must have mistaken me for someone else who was there?:-Jane
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Gandalf's Beard Wed Feb 16, 2011 8:21 am
No no, I wasn't ogling you here. I was ogling you on the other thread. 
GB
GB
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by janesmith Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:00 am
I fear then that my avatar is the villain here. How about this one?
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Gandalf's Beard Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:14 am
Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!! 
NO, change back please! For the love of God change back!
GB
NO, change back please! For the love of God change back! GB
_________________
The very first Hobbit Films fanfiction on the Internet, formerly known as The Adventures of Bilbo and Itaril when first posted waaaay back in 2009, revised and retitled as The Adventures of Bilbo and Tauriel
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5678122/1/The-Adventures-of-Bilbo-and-Tauriel
"It is like a finger pointing at the moon. Pay no attention to the finger or you will miss all that heavenly Glory"--Bruce Lee
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Pettytyrant101 Wed Feb 16, 2011 4:04 pm
Would the Archet Bugle be the same rag that got the photos from the picnic last year and embarrassed some of us who might have been up a tree at the time hiding from Beren?
Because if so then perhaps its time to go pay this reporter a visit, this Proudfoot person. Its time to go lick some Lesbo! (Hold on that doesn't sound right!)
Because if so then perhaps its time to go pay this reporter a visit, this Proudfoot person. Its time to go lick some Lesbo! (Hold on that doesn't sound right!)
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*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Ringdrotten Wed Feb 16, 2011 5:13 pm
This crappy Wednesday suddenly seems much more pleasant after reading this thread 
What became of Odo, though? Is he still in the drunk tank?
What became of Odo, though? Is he still in the drunk tank? _________________
“The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want for nothing. He makes me lie down in the green pastures. He greases up my head with oil. He gives me kung-fu in the face of my enemies. Amen”. - Tom Cullen
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Pettytyrant101 Wed Feb 16, 2011 5:44 pm
I'm not sure Ringdrotten. I think I remember seeing him dashing off somewhere in the early hours, without even a handkerchief would you believe- not like him at all. But then again it might just have been the Duckie, I seem to also remember using a cat as a set of bagpipes- and that can't be right!!. So who knows?
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*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
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Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
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*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Ringdrotten Wed Feb 16, 2011 5:46 pm
Sounds like I missed one hell of a party
_________________
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Ally Wed Feb 16, 2011 6:01 pm
The last page or so...you couldn't make this up! I don't say this about the Odo clan too often, but I love you all! 
Though I'm slightly tipsy- when I sober up disregard this comment!
Though I'm slightly tipsy- when I sober up disregard this comment!
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Eldorion Wed Feb 16, 2011 7:02 pm
Ringdrotten wrote:Sounds like I missed one hell of a party
Don't worry, none of us can remember a single coherent thing, so you're not alone.
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Eldorion Wed Feb 16, 2011 7:03 pm
Gandalf's Beard wrote:Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!
What was the avatar that got this reaction?
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Gandalf's Beard Wed Feb 16, 2011 7:17 pm
Eldorion wrote:Gandalf's Beard wrote:Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!
What was the avatar that got this reaction?
All I know is that it was some hideous old hag.
Not even the buckie-vision could have made her look good. 
The new one is better, but more likely to appeal to Petty who likes his ladies servile.
GB
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Gandalf's Beard Wed Feb 16, 2011 7:30 pm
Eldorion wrote:How cruel of her.
I think Jane is a Shape-Shifter! Or at least a Sorceress!
GB
_________________
The very first Hobbit Films fanfiction on the Internet, formerly known as The Adventures of Bilbo and Itaril when first posted waaaay back in 2009, revised and retitled as The Adventures of Bilbo and Tauriel
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5678122/1/The-Adventures-of-Bilbo-and-Tauriel
"It is like a finger pointing at the moon. Pay no attention to the finger or you will miss all that heavenly Glory"--Bruce Lee
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by The Archet Bugle Wed Feb 16, 2011 9:59 pm
NOON EDITION 
SHAPE-SHIFTER JOINS UNCEREMONIOUS BAND
The more this Respectable Journal digs, the more Muck we find. It appears there is no end to the alleged depravity occurring in Rushock Bog below Needlehole - or should that be "Cesspool below Blackabyss"? As the Respectable readers of this Respectable Journal already know, our entrepid reporter, Lesbo Proudfoot, has been unravelling the details of an absolutely sordid Event that occurred at the home that illustrious and handsome Gentlehobbit Odo R. Banks. To her Enormous Surprise, Lesbo has found out that Other Respectable Folk of Forumshire (or "The Shire" as we All prefer) attended the Disgusting Shindig. These folk, though well known to be no near as Respectable as Odo R. himself, at least still pretended to a level of Respectability that was a rung or two above that of a Hedge Goblin - but now we have unrused that ruse!
And we are now Ready to Name Names. (The Bugle - on Legal Advice - has chosen pseudonyms for said patrons of said Horrid Party Affair):-
Brimmula Rummybuck and Della Bigbunns - alleged to be Cohabitating with Master Odo!
Randy Hairychin - a Wizard-hobbit, it's said, though presumably of the "Saruman" variety, to judge from his Lack of Judgement and Refinement and preference for Pipeweed (in excesive quantities).
Putridbully103 - a Scotshobbit , apparently 103 in a line of kilt-dancing big-fat-bully cat-inflaters.
Elnorteous - a young hobbit whose taste for Unlawful Imbibing would make (as many as) ten gannets gag. He is possibly of Roman extraction - what more can we say?
Tinder - a Famous Elvish lass with a Perfect Nose but a Poor Choice of friends (quite an incendiary character to judge from the pseudonym we gave her!)
I need to mention also that a ragged band of other Respectable (?) folk have been drawn into the greasy web as after-the-fact accomplises: Stingdrivven (a Norwayan), Smally, Colly Jotton, Cafeteria, and no doubt there'll be others! (Some are so deeply "in" that they're not even aware of their complicity yet!)
Our Inside Source, the Redoubtable Porgy Bunk (who we regretfully initially believed was less than Redoubtable) has been assisting the Bugle in unravelling Every Sordid Detail (and will continue to do so as we helpfully prompt her memory), has also let slip that a certain smithjane has become involved indirectly and after the fact and so therefore complicitly in all that happened. Why do we make this Serious Imputation? We do so because smithjane is a Shapeshifter! A fact that clearly needs no proof.
Interview with Porgy Bunk:
HARDBUCKLE: Now Porgy, did you really get Enticed into Odo's house in all innocence?
BUNK: What does entice mean?
HARDBUCKLE: I see - so he offered to share Something Very Nice with you if you'd Join him in his dim dark-lit den?
BUNK: He was very generous with his beer - and his seedcakes were delicious.
HARDBUCKLE: Beer and Seedcakes was it. (Nod nod, wink wink). So he plastered you with beer, did he?
BUNK: Well, not plastered... exactly... I do like beer...
HARDBUCKLE: You poor innocent (reasonably young) woman. So he gave you lots of his Strong beer - and you had no idea what Effect it might have on you... being so (reasonably) Young and Innocent!
BUNK: Well, I couldn't really say that...
HARDBUCKLE: Out of fear of Repercussions, is it?
BUNK: Of Reper-what? Cousins, was it?
HARDBUCKLE: Ha! So you're in fear then of what might happen to you?
BUNK: You mean, if my Grandmother ever finds out?
HARDBUCKLE: Oh sweet Illuvatar! What did he do to you? Clearly something that would give your Grandmother Heart Failure!!!
BUNK: No, I wasn't going to say that...
HARDBUCKLE: My goodness! You mean it would give your Grandmother something Worse than Heart Failure"
BUNK: No, no, I wasn't going to say that either.
HARDBUCKLE: Oh dear (reasonably young) Lady! You can't mean something Worser than Worse than Heart Failure? By Illuvatar and All his Circle, my mind boggles! Is Odo R. a hobbit or an orc?
Rest assured, dear readers, I will delve further into the matter when Porgy is feeling a little more steady on her feet and off her (what appears to be) medication.
by Hoary Hardbuckle - Chief Reporter.
An elephant never forgets.
SHAPE-SHIFTER JOINS UNCEREMONIOUS BAND
The more this Respectable Journal digs, the more Muck we find. It appears there is no end to the alleged depravity occurring in Rushock Bog below Needlehole - or should that be "Cesspool below Blackabyss"? As the Respectable readers of this Respectable Journal already know, our entrepid reporter, Lesbo Proudfoot, has been unravelling the details of an absolutely sordid Event that occurred at the home that illustrious and handsome Gentlehobbit Odo R. Banks. To her Enormous Surprise, Lesbo has found out that Other Respectable Folk of Forumshire (or "The Shire" as we All prefer) attended the Disgusting Shindig. These folk, though well known to be no near as Respectable as Odo R. himself, at least still pretended to a level of Respectability that was a rung or two above that of a Hedge Goblin - but now we have unrused that ruse!
And we are now Ready to Name Names. (The Bugle - on Legal Advice - has chosen pseudonyms for said patrons of said Horrid Party Affair):-
Brimmula Rummybuck and Della Bigbunns - alleged to be Cohabitating with Master Odo!
Randy Hairychin - a Wizard-hobbit, it's said, though presumably of the "Saruman" variety, to judge from his Lack of Judgement and Refinement and preference for Pipeweed (in excesive quantities).
Putridbully103 - a Scotshobbit , apparently 103 in a line of kilt-dancing big-fat-bully cat-inflaters.
Elnorteous - a young hobbit whose taste for Unlawful Imbibing would make (as many as) ten gannets gag. He is possibly of Roman extraction - what more can we say?
Tinder - a Famous Elvish lass with a Perfect Nose but a Poor Choice of friends (quite an incendiary character to judge from the pseudonym we gave her!)
I need to mention also that a ragged band of other Respectable (?) folk have been drawn into the greasy web as after-the-fact accomplises: Stingdrivven (a Norwayan), Smally, Colly Jotton, Cafeteria, and no doubt there'll be others! (Some are so deeply "in" that they're not even aware of their complicity yet!)
Our Inside Source, the Redoubtable Porgy Bunk (who we regretfully initially believed was less than Redoubtable) has been assisting the Bugle in unravelling Every Sordid Detail (and will continue to do so as we helpfully prompt her memory), has also let slip that a certain smithjane has become involved indirectly and after the fact and so therefore complicitly in all that happened. Why do we make this Serious Imputation? We do so because smithjane is a Shapeshifter! A fact that clearly needs no proof.
Interview with Porgy Bunk:
HARDBUCKLE: Now Porgy, did you really get Enticed into Odo's house in all innocence?
BUNK: What does entice mean?
HARDBUCKLE: I see - so he offered to share Something Very Nice with you if you'd Join him in his dim dark-lit den?
BUNK: He was very generous with his beer - and his seedcakes were delicious.
HARDBUCKLE: Beer and Seedcakes was it. (Nod nod, wink wink). So he plastered you with beer, did he?
BUNK: Well, not plastered... exactly... I do like beer...
HARDBUCKLE: You poor innocent (reasonably young) woman. So he gave you lots of his Strong beer - and you had no idea what Effect it might have on you... being so (reasonably) Young and Innocent!
BUNK: Well, I couldn't really say that...
HARDBUCKLE: Out of fear of Repercussions, is it?
BUNK: Of Reper-what? Cousins, was it?
HARDBUCKLE: Ha! So you're in fear then of what might happen to you?
BUNK: You mean, if my Grandmother ever finds out?
HARDBUCKLE: Oh sweet Illuvatar! What did he do to you? Clearly something that would give your Grandmother Heart Failure!!!
BUNK: No, I wasn't going to say that...
HARDBUCKLE: My goodness! You mean it would give your Grandmother something Worse than Heart Failure"
BUNK: No, no, I wasn't going to say that either.
HARDBUCKLE: Oh dear (reasonably young) Lady! You can't mean something Worser than Worse than Heart Failure? By Illuvatar and All his Circle, my mind boggles! Is Odo R. a hobbit or an orc?
Rest assured, dear readers, I will delve further into the matter when Porgy is feeling a little more steady on her feet and off her (what appears to be) medication.
by Hoary Hardbuckle - Chief Reporter.
An elephant never forgets.
Last edited by The Archet Bugle on Thu Feb 17, 2011 1:56 am; edited 4 times in total
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Eldorion Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:05 pm
The Archet Bugle wrote:Randy Hairchin
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Pettytyrant101 Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:27 pm
I can't remember much but if its in the papers it must be true!
Wonder who this Putridbully103 is? I don't like the sound of them at all! And I wonder what clan he is?
Wonder who this Putridbully103 is? I don't like the sound of them at all! And I wonder what clan he is?
_________________
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A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
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*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view
*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
the crabbit will suffer neither sleight of hand nor half-truths. - Forest
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Ringdrotten Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:29 pm
_________________
“The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want for nothing. He makes me lie down in the green pastures. He greases up my head with oil. He gives me kung-fu in the face of my enemies. Amen”. - Tom Cullen
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Gandalf's Beard Thu Feb 17, 2011 12:26 am
GB
_________________
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https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5678122/1/The-Adventures-of-Bilbo-and-Tauriel
"It is like a finger pointing at the moon. Pay no attention to the finger or you will miss all that heavenly Glory"--Bruce Lee
"Absence of Evidence is not Evidence of Absence."--Carl Sagan
Gandalf's Beard- Emeritus
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by The Archet Bugle Thu Feb 17, 2011 1:51 am
BREAKING NEWS
ODO BANKS HITS LOCKHOLES - AGAIN!
News just in. Master Odo R. Banks of Rushock Bog (below Needlehole), has been arrested on "Gross Disrespectabilty" and associated charges. Assisting Inquiries are Miss Primula Brandybuck and Miss Bella Buttocks. More to follow in the Morning Edition (or thereabouts).
Lesbo Proudfoot - Crime Reporter
An elephant never forgets.
ODO BANKS HITS LOCKHOLES - AGAIN!
News just in. Master Odo R. Banks of Rushock Bog (below Needlehole), has been arrested on "Gross Disrespectabilty" and associated charges. Assisting Inquiries are Miss Primula Brandybuck and Miss Bella Buttocks. More to follow in the Morning Edition (or thereabouts).
Lesbo Proudfoot - Crime Reporter
An elephant never forgets.
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Eldorion Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:13 am
Poor Odo. 
Well, I hope that he's fine, but with the Shiriffs on the march I suspect that it is time for me to skip town. Please know that I greatly enjoyed our party and hope to get wasted enjoy a fine evening with everyone again soon. I bid you all a very fond farewell. 
Well, I hope that he's fine, but with the Shiriffs on the march I suspect that it is time for me to skip town. Please know that I greatly enjoyed our party and hope to
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Pettytyrant101 Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:17 am
Eldo! You'll be denying you know poor Odo three times by crock crow at this rate! For shame!
What's needed here is a rescue, and that obviously entails making plans, over a few buckies or ten and a pipe or two.
What's needed here is a rescue, and that obviously entails making plans, over a few buckies or ten and a pipe or two.
_________________
Pure Publications, The Tower of Lore and the Former Admin's Office are Reasonably Proud to Present-
A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view
*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view
*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
the crabbit will suffer neither sleight of hand nor half-truths. - Forest
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by The Archet Bugle Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:29 am
NEWSFLASH
MORE CHARGES LAID WHILE INTERESTED PARTIES RUN AWAY
The Forumshire Bailiff, Errol Walkingstick, has released the true account of charges facing Master Odo R. Banks:
(1) Gross Disrespectability,
(2) Gross Unrespectability,
(3) Socially Suspect Behavior,
(4) Allow Unexpected Party, and
(5) Proffer Beer to underage and/or (reasonably) young Gentlehobbits.
The Bailiff is looking for witnesses to come forward to assist in prosecuting this case.
The Bailiff also mentions that EVERYONE from the Alleged Party have gone to ground in a most cowardly fashion.
Lesbo Proudfoot - Crime Reporter.
Elephants never forget.
ADVERTISEMENT
"Nerdo's Bravery Pills."
These AMAZING pills, made from wholly natural products, collected from the very boggiest Bogs, are GUARANTEED to make the meekest hobbit become as Angry as a Dragon in a Pinch - and therefore, Brave. (WARNING: Do not take with other Prescription medicines).
MORE CHARGES LAID WHILE INTERESTED PARTIES RUN AWAY
The Forumshire Bailiff, Errol Walkingstick, has released the true account of charges facing Master Odo R. Banks:
(1) Gross Disrespectability,
(2) Gross Unrespectability,
(3) Socially Suspect Behavior,
(4) Allow Unexpected Party, and
(5) Proffer Beer to underage and/or (reasonably) young Gentlehobbits.
The Bailiff is looking for witnesses to come forward to assist in prosecuting this case.
The Bailiff also mentions that EVERYONE from the Alleged Party have gone to ground in a most cowardly fashion.
Lesbo Proudfoot - Crime Reporter.
Elephants never forget.
ADVERTISEMENT
"Nerdo's Bravery Pills."
These AMAZING pills, made from wholly natural products, collected from the very boggiest Bogs, are GUARANTEED to make the meekest hobbit become as Angry as a Dragon in a Pinch - and therefore, Brave. (WARNING: Do not take with other Prescription medicines).
The Archet Bugle- Forumshire's Most Respectable Journal
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Re: Howdy from Needlehole
by Pettytyrant101 Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:34 am
'The Bailiff also mentions that EVERYONE from the Alleged Party have gone to ground in a most cowardly fashion.' -Lesbo Proudfoot
That is a scuroloose., lus, not fair charge, hic, I have not gone to ground! I am merely lying on it.
That is a scuroloose., lus, not fair charge, hic, I have not gone to ground!
I am merely lying on it._________________
Pure Publications, The Tower of Lore and the Former Admin's Office are Reasonably Proud to Present-
A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view
*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
A Green And Pleasant Land
Compiled and annotated by Eldy.
- get your copy here for a limited period- free*
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view
*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales[/b]
the crabbit will suffer neither sleight of hand nor half-truths. - Forest
Pettytyrant101- Crabbitmeister
- Posts : 46593
Join date : 2011-02-14
Age : 52
Location : Scotshobbitland
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