Merry Christmas - 2017

I can appreciate that ! ( Eldo ) That is a known factor in this home.

yep me too. only its crappy daytime TV that does the job. very soothing a couple of episodes of Mistresses.

only the bastards have cancelled the show just as Karen Kim returned from being stalked by her nanny who was in love with her boyfriend after pretending to be Karen on a online dating website...see, it that doesn't zonk you out nothing will.

{{This is why I drink until I collapse Well, its that or actually dealing with things!! (more seriously Eldo I have found its best to treat the human ego not as a part of yourself but as an interloper -which it is anyway, you weren't born with one it built itself out of self interest and pain- and it doesn't have anyone's interest in mind but its own - which is what you would expect after all from an ego! But does make it a very unreliable adviser and guide- best to ignore it most of the time I find)}}}

The world needs cynical people. Someone needs the responsibility of being grounded while everyone else is floating away.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:more seriously Eldo I have found its best to treat the human ego not as a part of yourself but as an interloper -which it is anyway, you weren't born with one it built itself out of self interest and pain- and it doesn't have anyone's interest in mind but its own - which is what you would expect after all from an ego! But does make it a very unreliable adviser and guide- best to ignore it most of the time I find

It doesn't sound like you're using ego in the Freudian sense but I'm not sure if you're using the colloquial definition to say that I need to keep an inflated sense of self-importance in check (and I mean, if that's how I come across, I'd rather know for sure so I can reflect on that) or if you're using a meaning that I'm not familiar with.

Sorry if I'm being dense.

to say that I need to keep an inflated sense of self-importance in check- Eldo

{{Ha, no, not at all in that sense. More a case of the voice we all have in our head can be a treacherous one, it likes to wallow in self pity and negative thoughts about itself as that keeps the focus on itself. And that's true for everyone to a lesser or greater extent. And it tends to be loudest and hardest to ignore late at night, in the dark or on your own and especially all three.
Crowley believed that inner voice was the main cause of human misery he recommended as an experiment nipping yourself every time you have a thought containing anything self referential "I' "Me'" "mine" ect just to demonstrate how often that voice needs to reaffirm itself. Done it myself many moons ago was shocking how often the inner voice talks about itself! Meditation is a means to shut it up of course but its worth just paying attention to, as normally we just let it ramble on to itself without really considering what we are repeating over and over to ourselves all the time and is it really healthy.}}}

Freud's ego is not the modern ego. Sense of self versus inflated sense of self.

Pettytyrant101 wrote:normally we just let it ramble on to itself without really considering what we are repeating over and over to ourselves all the time and is it really healthy.

Especially when you do it out loud, and in public places!

Thanks for explaining, Petty. I'm not familiar with much about Crowley's way of thinking so I'd have to read up on the subject to have an opinion.

halfwise wrote:Freud's ego is not the modern ego.  Sense of self versus inflated sense of self.

I know, which is why I distinguished between the Freudian definition and the colloquial definition in my previous post.

Difficulty establishing a sense of self that is not dependent on other people's approval (and just generally seeing oneself as one's own separate, autonomous person) is a fairly developed subject of mental health research and practice but I dunno if anyone here takes that kind of thing seriously.

Well, you have my approval in any case, if it is useful

Especially when you do it out loud, and in public places!- Forest


{{Like all good jailers I sometimes let my inner ego out for a stroll round the metaphorical block of Forumshire }}

Thanks, Blue.

Update on the gf situation, yesterday was the 6 month anniversary since our first date and things couldn't be going better we are deeply in love, have yet to have a single major argument, and share such similar outlooks, interests and humour it feels like we are two halves of the same person (something her parents have commented on as well ), I swear with each passing day our relationship and trust in each other grows, I've met her parents, siblings and other members of her extended family multiple times and they all like and accept me for who I am, her mum has commented how happy we seem together and thanked me for making her daughter so happy

{{Glad you are happy Malick. Long may it last   }}}

You are soooo fortunate ! what are the chances of meeting your soul mate especially these days when everything, including people, are so easily "chucked away". Best wishes to you !!

Thanks guys for all the advice and good wishes, best wishes to all you too

Well despite our best efforts your relationship has proved to have all the staying power of Trump, and I hope it's at least as entertaining for you.

(Since neither Petty nor Az could manage to fill the role I've tried to come up with something suitably cynical and that's the best I could do.)

{{{ 'Long may it last' is an ancient McTyrant clan saying, spoken to the would be bride grooms by their fathers, its meant as a sort of curse! As in, now were both stuck in it and you'll soon know what its really all about! }}}

Awfully circumspect way of saying things.  You'd almost give the lad the impression you were glad he was happy!  

You'd almost give the lad the impression you were glad he was happy!- Halfwise

{{ We are talking about a Scottish father here, that concept is not known and no Scottish son would ever assume it! You have to remember the highest compliment a son can ever hope for in achieving anything, up to and including Ruler of the Universe is ,"Aye, noo bad A suppose." }}}

 thats cool news Malick

I sharnt rain on anybody's parade when you can definitely feel the vibes that Malick has struck gold To be honest there is fuck all in this world that can lift you up or tear you down more than "love". Its too powerful & dynamic. So, if it feels good & your happy as a pig in shit & you welcome every day with a smile instead of tea & a roll up then, Im happy for you !!
I shall go off & have a tantrum, kick doors, throw a few chairs & mutter some incantation, sulk, swear, eyeball the cat, harness the dogs & go for a walk.....

azriel wrote:I sharnt rain on anybody's parade when you can definitely feel the vibes that Malick has struck gold   To be honest there is fuck all in this world that can lift you up or tear you down more than "love". Its too powerful & dynamic. So, if it feels good & your happy as a pig in shit & you welcome every day with a smile instead of tea & a roll up then, Im happy for you !!  
I shall go off & have a tantrum, kick doors, throw a few chairs & mutter some incantation, sulk, swear, eyeball the cat, harness the dogs & go for a walk.....

I mean I am very happy and very much in love...but I do still greet each new day with a cup of tea (or several) averaging about 10 a day at the moment...is that a bad thing?

10 cups a day! That's almost Chinese, who shudder at the thought of drinking straight water (at least unheated water).