Thinklings

You'll be pleased to know, Mr Banks, that I have recently been appointed Mother Superior at "Frocks." I hope you don't mind me using the school's nickname. I use it so as to indicate to our prospective parents and students our appreciation of (appropriate) humour here. I do so, though, in the hope I'm not giving the impression that we take humour too seriously. School should never be all about fun or laughter, as I'm sure you'll agree; we here have important things to teach!

As to your recent enquiries about out curriculum, a list of subjects for our first years follow.

1. History of Forumshire.
2. Studies in Respectability (including two sessions per day on How to Recognise and Resist Unrespectability).
3. Illuvataran (Eruvan) Studies.
4. Needlework: Practical Appications.
5. Needlework: Theory. The whys and wherefores of making Respectable Girls' Clothing.
6. Geography.
7. Cookery.
8. Local History: New Subject - "A Great Family of Forumshire." (((I'm pleased to have you on board - dear Mr Banks!)))
9. A Woman's Place in Forumshire Society.

I look forward to your further questions.

:-Janesmith
Mother Superior,
c/- "Our Lady of the Anklelength Frock", Frogmorton.

I prefer knitting and crochet to needlework.

I'm fairly sure they do that kind of thing in Third Year, Baingil.

Dear Baingil,

"Knitting" is not for everyone. It requires patience, skill, dexterity and a sure hand. I'd suggest you concentrate on "Simple Sewing" and when you have learned at least some of the fundamentals, have your Parents apply for a place here. As to crochet, that is an Art reserved for our best Seniors, and so you must put it out of your mind - at least until you have achieved much else and learned a modicum of wisdom.

yours with decorous fondness,
:-Jane

I still regret not going to "Our Lady". My time at "Rushock Thatchers" still gives me nightmares. Especially when I consider the odds and sods (the dregs) of Rushock Bog I had to sit next to at "Reeding" class. Worse still, I was left with no real knowledge of Comportment or Needlecraft, things I wish I'd learned so as to have become a better candidate for wedlock. Now I'm stuck with GB and Petty as "prospects". And, Kafria, when you suggested I throw the net further, all I found were roguish descendants of exiled hobbits in Gondor and Bree. They've (almost) been worse "prospects" than GB and Petty, if that's possible!

All well and good, ladies. But would you be as kind as to get off the Thinklings Thread. This is a thread for the use of gentlehobbits, remember!






((( )))

janesmith wrote:Dear Baingil,

"Knitting" is not for everyone. It requires patience, skill, dexterity and a sure hand. I'd suggest you concentrate on "Simple Sewing" and when you have learned at least some of the fundamentals, have your Parents apply for a place here. As to crochet, that is an Art reserved for our best Seniors, and so you must put it out of your mind - at least until you have achieved much else and learned a modicum of wisdom.

yours with decorous fondness,
:-Jane

Oh, I know Simple Sewing quite well, thanks. And I crochet and knit quite well, is what I was saying, if I do say so myself. Even make my own patterns sometimes.

Will GB or Petty ever make a move on poor Mirabella?

Dear Baingil,

We at "Our Lady" teach things like "knitting' and "crochet" and "sewing" up to Private School Standard. But I am certainly not suggesting you would have no skill in these areas - it's not impossible. Perhaps you might send us a picture or two of your handiwork. Our Expert Teachers might then be able to assess your merit. I assume you will need to be of a high Scholarship Standard to even think about coming here - you do sound like you come from, let us say, a background that other students here haven't come from. That's if your previous correspondence on Forumshire is anything to go by. I await your "pictures" expectantly. You may surprise us all.

yours with worthy forbearance,
:-Jane

Oh Eldo - I fear I'm stuck with GB or Petty - maybe even both Yes, they are definitely unsavoury types, yet, my body clock ticks, and I might need to subsume my standards dramatically if ever I am to become a fullfilled woman! Marrying both of them might not be exactly respectable, but the alternative would be worse, don't you think?! And, yes, their dragging of the chain does my confidence no good, not at all!

Dear Jane,

I do not have many pictures on hand at the moment, for I prefer my work to be seen first-hand, but here is a potholder of my own design that I happen to have a picture of.

janesmith wrote:Dear Baingil,

We at "Our Lady" do teach things like "knitting' and "crochet" and "sewing", but up to Private School Standard. But I am certainly not suggesting you would have no skill in these areas - it's not impossible. Perhaps you might send us a picture or two of your handiwork. Our Expert Teachers might then be able to assess your merit. I assume you will need to be of a high Scholarship Standard to even think about coming here - you do sound like you come from, let us say, a background that other students here haven't come from. That's if your previous correspondence on Forumshire is anything to go by. I await your "pictures" expectantly. You may surprise us all.

yours with worthy forbearance,
:-Jane

Perhaps she has!

Do I need to start up a "Mothercraft" thread? Will you ladies please go somewhere else to talk these things over. I'm waiting for some of the guys to come here and start a male-type conversation! I think you're scaring them off.

(((I'm not surprised GB and Mr Tyrant haven't showed themselves, Mirabella. Unreliable sorts. Make you late for dinner types.... What was so bad about that Snotty Snodgrass chap you met in Bree? He seemed... err... well, a better choice than the other two!)))

(((((((((((((( Hope this is encripted enough, wouldn't do for Odo to find out. Psst Mirabella! You know, if it is your body clock that is the real problem and you don't want to settle for the type of man who doesn't show he cares there is another option you know!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-13460455

I know it's not the same, but waiting around for Petty or GB to get round to thinking of the future may mean you just wait and wait. you also have to ask yourself that if this kind of inattention is really what you want out of the significant other in your life, if it is sapping your confidence now what will you feel like in ten years with this amount of inattention from your hubby? ))))))))))))))))))

Oh hello Odo! Me? just checking on the crochett and sewing and knitting some of my hobbies you know!

Quite alright, Kafria. I'm feeling quite tolerant at the moment. Sunny just got into Our Lady you see. Shady next - I hope! You'll have to move off to GGT though as I've sent the girls there. A more appropriate place for home craftery, don't you think?

((((((((((Oh what wise advice, Kafria. I think a six foot tall Danish hobbit will do ever so nicely! )))))))))))

This is just one of the reasons why I don't want girls on this thred! Mirabella, you MUST concentrate!!! If you're going to open a post, please remember to put somehing on it! ---Girls!

I am sure that you have many unneeded spaces in your post, Odo. I think you must have fallen asleep for a few seconds with your finger on the enter key!

I suspect someone is asleep here, Squatch, yes indeed! (Here to help!) I also sense a "spell" in the air... I have a nose for these things.... And if I did not know better, I'd say is was a some kind of encryption spell.... cinnamon, yes, cinnamon...

*mixes pepper with the cinnamon*

((((((Baingil, I think I swapped the pepper with some gunpowder! No, wait, don't take that match-))))))

BOOM!!

Erm, Odo?

(((((((...oops?)))))))

Mwhahahahahaha.

((((((Erm, Baingil? Oopsy! ))))))

Oops

If I've said it once I've said it a hundred times, you girls, get off this thread!

And get off Odo's lawn, too!