Agent Nora and the Troll

Agent Nora kicked off her shoes, stretched out and put her feet up on the desk. She yawned, scratched her nose and watched one of the Svalfart Polar bears saunter over to the kitchen rubbish bins rip out a chunk of solid iron door and shove its head through the ragged hole.
Agent Bungo entered the office and stood behind Nora, they both watched lazily as PC Blue the new rookie cop was chased across the police station carpark by another hungry bear.
''you shouldnt giggle should you?'' said Nora, ''but these newbies dont realize how many things can get you killed in Svalfart''.
PC Blue, his face pink with panic, had managed to reach the station door, he hammered on the locked door, he was shouting something, but they could only get the action not the audio. A bear sniffed his regulation shoe, maybe it smelled tasty, but it would never find out, rescue had come, the door opened and Blue charged in headfirst.
''Maybe next time'' said Agent bungo with a sigh. Svalfart was pretty dull, no crime for weeks, and then last week there had been a strange intrusion into the police station, things had gone missing or moved, and strange messages had been daubed across the walls in red paint. The toilet had overflowed and liquid poo had spread in a foul smelling pool across the bathroom floor, the stench had lasted a Whole week. Somebody with a very large bottom had been leaving nightly presents in the loos, nobody knew who it was and tempers were getting thin.
Inspector Petty and Eldo had ordered an inquiry, everyone was at maximum alert, but Agent Nora was determined to solve the mystery, get promotion and full moderator powers. Eldo had other ideas and had no intention of letting his new wife Nora join the secretive mods club. No one knew what went on in the meetings, but it seemed to involve beer, a hammer, and lots of snacks.

Huzzah, another Agent Nora tale!

NB I love the topicality of stories in the Creative Corner.

"Agent Bungo entered the office and stood behind Nora, they both watched lazily as PC Blue the new rookie cop was chased across the police station carpark by another hungry bear."


Shouldn't laugh, I know...

PC Blue looking rather flustered and windblown, stumbled into the common room and sank into a comfy chair.
''phew'', he said in a hearty manner to no one in particular, ''ha ha that was close, look! he drooled on my troosers'', he frowned and then said unsteadily, ''he didnt bite me though'' and started to weep.
Agent Nora felt quite bad at having giggled earlier, had a very rare attack of feeling guilty. She passed a tissue over to Blue and punched his shoulder in a matey way.
''Dont worry Blue'', she said, ''the last guy got his head bitten off''.
PC Blue looked at her with eyes wide with terror, he shot out of his chair and ran for the bathroom.
DI Lance tut tutted at Nora, ''you cant go soft on the newbies you know, have to train em up and ship em out''. He waved a piece of roast beef and put it into Blue's coat pocket. ''remember my first week?'' he said, ''locked me in a broom closet with Orwell for 5 hours'' he shuddered then giggled, went a deep red colour, and then jingled his coins in a manly way. ''made a man out of me it did''
'yeah yeah boring'' said Nora, ''what up with this troll?''

Shouldn't laugh at that one, I know, but:

{{{}}}

Whaaat?

Now this is slander surely.  (  )

Anyone knows one should play dead if one meet a bear.   ( )

It is interesting to see what kiind of impression one has made though.  

Eldorion wrote:Huzzah, another Agent Nora tale!

NB I love the topicality of stories in the Creative Corner.

topicality?


YEY!  for Agent Nora and poop!

''remember my first week?'' he said, ''locked me in a broom closet with Orwell for 5 hours'' he shuddered then giggled, went a deep red colour, and then jingled his coins in a manly way. ''made a man out of me it did''

wow...

Bluebottle wrote:Whaaat?

Now this is slander surely.  (  )

Anyone knows one should play dead if one meet a bear.   ( )

It is interesting to see what kiind of impression one has made though.  

yeah, not sure why the sole new Fjordlandian is the one to get chased by a polar bear, but figure it's all one with the newbie hazing.  Great image though, nonchalantly watching you get chased across the parking lot by a bear.

because he's a southerner.. that's why.

 

I see there's a pecking order.

well observed.

Whaaat?

Well, that might be it I guess.  

Though it should be said only one person here was born in Oslo.

Well I'll most willingly bow to your superior knowledge on this matter my northern friend though I think the only place there has actually been a polar bear out and about anywhere near the fjordlandian mainland was in Bergen harbour.

http://www.bt.no/nyheter/lokalt/Isbjornen-i-Vagen-1889581.html

oi. wrong! there used to be lots of polar bears here.. they took em from svalbard after having killed their mothers, then sold them of as pets (!) and to zoos.

source: http://www.nordlys.no/nyheter/article5845436.ece

Was more thinking as in escaped, not in zoos and stuff. But I'll willingly consede that might have quite likely have happened up in your parts as well.  

Soon the common room filled up with all the new recruits, they were all nervously eyeing each other up, trying to gage the depth to which they could take the piss without offence. They all sat up a bit too straight, their trousers were rather too well pressed and starched, the long timers looked on them with a kind of nostalgic bonhomie mixed with sadistic glee. Someone was going to go after the Troll and it wasnt going to be pretty or fragrant work, and obviously the newbies were going to get the dubious pleasure.
Agent Nora remembered her first Troll, many moons ago. She had been sent out on patrol with DI's Eldo and Petty, they had found a sleeping sailor on the dock with a frozen Herring sticking out his poonanny, and that had cemented their friendship in a fishy kind of way.
Tonight it was Nora's turn to take out the newbies for a midnight patrol round the unsavory parts of Svalfart, just her PC Blue, Malick and AGENT Bungo.
''Oi you lot'' said Sargeant Forest, ''have you all washed your hands, and got your boots well oiled?'', ''you cant go out kicking the civilians and leaving prints you know''. Sargeant Forest was firm but fair and didnt take any shennanigans from the impetuous rookies. PC Bungo had tried his luck on a couple of occasions and called in late, but on encountering the wrathful Sargeant harooming in the front office, well it was enough to put a heebies on even the toughest police officer.

seems all people in svalfart work in the police force no wonder there's no crime

Except for police brutality it seems.  

Though if they are all in the police force who can they be brutal to?

Maybe the bears?  

Though I might be biased.  

its probably rogue Penguins

Wait, Bungo is an agent in the first installment. When did he get demoted to PC?

  sorry short attention span.

 you will be re-promoted asap.  

They would have to be very rouge to end up in the wrong hemisphere.  

But you're the writer, and if that is your artistic vision let's go for it.

Also Figg, for all my "protestations" this is a very enjoyable read like all your other stories. Keep up the good work.