The Daily Purist

Yours brother dear, I pay to not to have mine yellow. Feeling better?

Yeah thanks sis. You always come through when I need you. Could have done without the kick in the sporran though. But thanks.

I was just making sure, you were pretty far gone this time. What have you not got to do? Thats right, no falling asleep drunk in the woods under the stars around elves. Now I have to get back to the Dark Planet before Pure publications spots me and docks my buckie pay. Try to stay out of trouble. Oh and Petty one last thing. ((SLAP)) That was the for the line about my hair!

But I haven't finished my popcorn yet!

These things never last long Ringdrotten dear, Petty never could beat me in a fight.

I heard that. Anytime you want to put that to the test sis you know where to find me.

Yes upside down in a ditch with the farmyard animal of your choice.

Well youd be the expert given the amount of pigs you've slept with on your way to the top of the NotP.

Popcorn time might not be over yet.

OOh do you really want to go there Petty? What about that time we came home and found you on the roof with that scarecrow, the big bucket and the rubber jacket? And what about the time you took that troll to the dance? You said it was a bet and you never even walked her home but I found the letter from the Doctor and you were treated for a dose of shale!

That was private correspondence you *#!!#. Right if you want it like that lets see what it says in your diary. Hah!

Baingil wrote:Popcorn time might not be over yet.

Give me that back you little #$!*. I amm so going to kill you this time. I'll strangle you with your own bagpipes you #*$!# Where did you get that?

Same place as usual under the squeaky floorboard. Now lets see whats being happening recently, "saw Taz today, he is soo big and strong, I'm blushing just thinking about what he makes me feel. .."Faither was right about you, your just a cat on heat. Mam would be turning in her grave if she wasnt still alive and working in Faithers mine.

Here's something for you both to throw at eachother to our amusement!

Eggs are also good for throwing.

Here's some more popcorn, Ringdrotten.

Mam doesn't work in the mine, thats just what she tell you and Faither. She works in a bar. Dancing. Topless. So there, how do you like that. She's just like me Petty. And your just like a Faither a buckie filled incompentant Scothobbit like all the rest.

Thankyou Ringdrotten but unless you want one of those used as a suppository I sugest you keep out of this- this is family business.
And you Petty are about to be on the recieiving side of some elder sister wisdom, delivered by means of this haggis booted right up your kilt at high speed. Captain of the All Girls Highland Rugby Team know you. Speciality kicking and flirting with referees. Catch this Petty you *$#!*$

Baingil wrote:
Here's some more popcorn, Ringdrotten.

Why, thank you, Baingil I'm afraid mine got hit by a haggis and some eggs!

OH Feck!!!!!!!!! oooooooooooooof! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!

3 points I believe and the crowds go wild.

What will dear leelee think?

Thats she's been spared the deep embarrasment of Petty being infatauted with her thanks to me kicking the complete $*#! out of him and the crabbit back in?

Ewwww.

(((((((Egg in the hair might be a good comeback to that, Petty!)))))))

Look behind you Pretty.

I'm not falling for that old one Petty.