Naughty Forumshirers

I've started this for Forumshirers who have been banned by Dark Planet for "Naughtiness."

At this stage, only yours truly and Pretty Tyrant are welcome here.

(And that's "Pretty Tyrant", Petty, no un-banned brothers allowed! I mean, fancy letting your sister do your dirty work, and letting her be banished and all, you cad! )

This is gonna be sooo much fun...



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is that the time? I wonder where Pretty is?

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i'm sooo lonely...



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oh - a mirror ...

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it's very lonely here...



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it's getting late

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i'm scared...



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......... Pretty? Is that you? Oh it's just the gate creaking

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what's this... oooh i shouldn't...



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is that the time...?

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Orwell? You there dear? Oh asleep, how like a man. Hasn't even finished setting this place up properly, look at it. What a mess, not a cushion in sight or anything with lace edging or pink. Its like being in Petty's barrell, but with les tartan and buckie stains.
Guess I'll have to sort this place about before he wakes, and I'm so tired still from all my efforts on the Dark PLanet dealing with Taz, my knees are red and chaffed. Oh well, more scrubbing.

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huh? whose makin'that darn racket...?



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tired...

Right thats this place looking a bit more civilized. What I need is some candles and a hot bath. Oh and first I have to let Orwell back down I suppose, I strung him up to the ceiling whilst he slept to get him out the way and so I could get on. Mmmm, now where is that old tin bath, just fill it with freezing water-oh look my reflection how lovely, now drag it in here, hmmph, there we go just about right, straght below. And now if I cut this rope here holding Olly.!! Wakey! Wakey!

Time for popcorn, I think!

What the blazin' blazers!!!

Oh it's you Pretty --- but who's this bundle of bad manners???

Get ye gone, Baingil

--- unless --- unless, of course, you've had IT done to you as well?

Because if you haven't had IT done to you, well, you shouldn't EVEN BE HERE!

Unless - of course -- you've been cleaning up --- which would be nice of you...

... Ahh! Pretty, nice to see you here.... at last...

Sorry Orwell but when a mood to clean descends upon me then I just got to clean and accessorise- and that includes you! (Bow ties are cool!) So while you're in that bath here is some carbolic soap for your mouth, bleach..., for the rest, and this magic scrubbing brush-well its magic how it can remove an entire layer of skin- Maw Tyrant was fierce with this in her hand. Petty used to run a mile into the hills on bath night and hide in the tablet mines, which was bad for his teeth and his hygene. Course Maw found a way round him in the end- buckie baths- afer that the hard bit was stopping him drinking it all before Maw could get him clean! Course Maw always had a way to deal with that, she had a heck of a mean right hook.
Oh now where was I? Ah yes I was going to arrange these lovely flowers I found growing- they are a bit unusual, never seen their like before, for some odd reason there were growing on the river bank, just in one spot, not far from that Lady School place that weirdo Jane runs. I wonder what sort of flower they will have? I'm sure it will be pretty enough to grow next to me, although it had beter not be too pretty!!

Orwell wrote:
Get ye gone, Baingil

--- unless --- unless, of course, you've had IT done to you as well?

Because if you haven't had IT done to you, well, you shouldn't EVEN BE HERE!

I've messed around a bit with information technology but I'm not a computer.

And I'll go where I please. This looks interesting. (Just need someone to share some popcorn with...)

As I suspect you haven't been banned by Dark Planet, I must assume you're gate crashing here, Baingil... I can't stop you visiting this exclusive thread, so my only response is to totally ignore you henceforth (for your own good, mind). If you want to be made to feel welcome here, go to Dark Planet and seek ye banishment!

As to you, my pretty, Pretty, I appreciate you removing the rust of ages, though the terible pain, and horrid taste in my mouth, are not received particularly gladly. Nonetheless, as I intimated already, thanks. You're a good woman, know your place, your role, and your manner of dress is eye catching. I would have cleaned up the house myself, but, as you no doubt realise, I'm a Real Man and don't do such Feminine occupations. Now, have you shopped? What's for lunch?

Feel free to ignore me, I'm just here to watch.

Oh dear sweet Orwell, numerous are the ways I could break you and only 1 of them would you enjoy. I do not cook, save breakfasts. If I am eating at any other hour of the day I not only expect someone else to be cooking for me I also expect someone else to be paying for it.
You could try cooking up one of these pod things that plant I brought home has sprouted? Jings! They are a bit...phallic! You could try making a cock-a-leekie soup out of it.

Hmm... yes, we could cook up something ... later maybe.... Well, make yourself comfortable, take this seat Pretty and I'll just sit over..........................................here. Now, that's good. (Err you wouldn't mind crossing your legs, would you? ) ... What will we chat about? How about "Anarchism"? It is an interesting subject ... .. okay you sit here and I'll sit over ....................................here. Now, Proudhon was a interesting figure, he had some very interesting ideas... ............ Okay, political philosophy is not your thing (don't do that ) .... what about poetry...? everyone loves poetry... I'll read you some, shall I? Best I sit over........................................................................ here... Can you hear me, Pretty? No, no, no - I don't mind shouting.... .... Pretty!!!!!

You are a little...distant Orwell. Why must you sit at the far end of that huge table? Ah well, no option but to crawl towards you, slowly and with just the right amount of calculated hip swing and blouse cleavage to smack you right between the eyes.....there now why don't I perch myself just here. Why Orwell you look so flustered. I'll just wipe this sweat from your brow. Now why don't you tell me a little about yourself starting with average annual income, investment protfolios and property owned. I have special skills for those with, financial needs.

Whist? I'll get the cards, shall I....? They're here somewhere...

What kind of naughty though? The I've just punched a gerbil in the face naughty, or the "Oooh, I need a dirty woman Oooh, I need a dirty girl" Pink Floyd kind of naughty?

Ally wrote:What kind of naughty though? The I've just punched a gerbil in the face naughty, or the "Oooh, I need a dirty woman Oooh, I need a dirty girl" Pink Floyd kind of naughty?

Ally, I've just got Pretty to concentrate on the cards, do you mind!