Allow me to reintroduce myself

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Ringdrotten
azriel
Mrs Figg
halfwise
Pettytyrant101
Norc
David H
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Post by Mrs Figg Fri Sep 28, 2018 7:40 pm

I think Norc's advice is cool, maybe you could keep your clothes neutral colours and classic but go crazy with the accessories to jazz things up until you feel confident with pattern and colour. if you have just had mens t-shirts and jeans all your life its hard to suddenly have the dressing up box at your disposal. If it was me I would personalize with an artistic bag, scarf, shoes and jools. Find things that express your artistic/feminine side, and then when you feel its time to go the Full Monty choose clothes to match your new image. Also the thing about women's clothes is there is too much stuff to choose from, like one season we are dressing like pirates and the next its hippy and the next its animal print. we have too much choice and it can be confusing, maybe look at some fashion mags to get ideas. As for hair, definitely go to a professional hairdresser who can advise about hair extensions or wigs, because a cheap bad wig is a no no, it wont be flattering.
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Post by Forest Shepherd Sat Sep 29, 2018 1:46 am

Hey just wanted to stop by and say good luck with things and I hope you continue to grow into your own person throughout the coming years. Smile

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Post by Eldy Sat Sep 29, 2018 4:37 am

azriel wrote:I feel so proud of you & Im not even your mum ! Smile  You are going to have so much fun with all the girlie bits of life as your confidence grows. Its easy for me, I can wear trousers as well as skirts so it feels natural but you, you've only known trousers since a wee little lad Smile  Men wear sarongs & kaftans in hot countries tho & that's taken for granted. I honestly don't care what people wear, if men want to wear skirts, ok. Just look nice & be comfortable in the clothes you do like. Its only fabric. Remember, one life, this aint a rehearsal Smile

( I like wrapping necklaces round my wrists too, especially love beads )

Hey azriel, thank you for your kind words and encouragement. I agree that men should be free to wear whatever they want, but that's not really what's going on in my case. Razz Dressing a certain way obviously isn't a requirement for being a woman (cis or trans), but it's been nice for me so far as a concrete way of starting to actualize my real gender identity, especially since I have yet to start any of the physical aspects of transition.

malickfan wrote:Well done Eldy, proud of you Smile it's the first step on a long journey, but you will soon get the hang of it, even as an occasional crossdresser myself I can't pretend to know much about female fashion trend/coordinating outfits etc and I definitely wouldn't pass with the beard Laughing (not that I am even attempting to) I do it mostly for a bit of fun with my girlfriend (women's fashion is so much more interesting then the various shades of black/grey that make up most of my clothes, oddly enough we are very similar sizes), being trans you are coming at this from a completely different approach and I only do this occasionally (and then only in private, absolutely no way I'd ever go out in public dressed like this), but I'm sure there's friends and family who would be willing to offer you more advice, it's not something you can just get the hang of overnight.

Here's a photo of me dressed up (pink jacket coat/red dress/black knee boots/leggings/shawl):

[image snipped]

(not pictured the makeup/nails I was also wearing, as I said I definitely don't pass with the beard, my girlfriend's mum thought it was hilarious, as did one of my friends (who identifies as a gender neutral lesbian), IIRC we bought these clothes the same day we looked round a WW2 museum, talk about a contrast...)

Thanks malick! Smile I've gotten some advice so far, yeah, and I'm trying to keep in mind that I'm not gonna be able to absorb in a few weeks everything that some people my age learned over the course of 15+ years. Razz I'm still surprised that I've actually enjoyed trying things on and seeing how I look in different styles. Though that seems to be part of a general uptick in interest in personal care and a less fatalistic attitude towards always hating my body, which has been a pleasant change.

Also:

Allow me to reintroduce myself - Page 3 G8Jbhgjm


Last edited by Eldy on Sat Sep 29, 2018 5:39 am; edited 2 times in total
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Post by Eldy Sat Sep 29, 2018 4:42 am

halfwise wrote:The all-body shaving routine must be hell.

Shaving itself hasn't been too bad; I started taking baths (mixed in with showers) for the first time in many years and just went to town everywhere I could reach with a disposable razor. The razor bumps really suck, especially after the first time, but I've started trying to develop a skin care regimen to reduce those. It's a big change from bar soap applied with bare hands followed by absolutely nothing, but it hasn't felt as overwhelming as I worried it might.

Norc wrote:there is lazer-treatment... or.. one could not care.

I'd hoped that Nair (depilatory cream) might mean I could skip shaving altogether, but I have really thick and coarse hair so it wasn't entirely effective. I was pleasantly surprised that I didn't cut the shit out of my arms and legs while shaving, though. Razz I always hated the amount of body hair I used to have and even a few weeks ago it was something that felt inescapable, so it's been really nice having less of it. Might try electrolysis or laser hair removal at some point down the line, but who knows.


Last edited by Eldy on Sat Sep 29, 2018 4:59 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Eldy Sat Sep 29, 2018 4:56 am

Mrs Figg wrote:I think Norc's advice is cool, maybe you could keep your clothes neutral colours and classic but go crazy with the accessories to jazz things up until you feel confident with pattern and colour. if you have just had mens t-shirts and jeans all your life its hard to suddenly have the dressing up box at your disposal. If it was me I would personalize with an artistic bag, scarf, shoes and jools. Find things that express your artistic/feminine side, and then when you feel its time to go the Full Monty choose clothes to match your new image. Also the thing about women's clothes is there is too much stuff to choose from, like one season we are dressing like pirates and the next its hippy and the next its animal print. we have too much choice and it can be confusing, maybe look at some fashion mags to get ideas. As for hair, definitely go to a professional hairdresser who can advise about hair extensions or wigs, because a cheap bad wig is a no no, it wont be flattering.

Thanks for the advice, Mrs Figg! I bought a cheap purse from the thrift shop just for utilitarian reasons but I'm starting to think about accessories. Fortunately someone I know gave me a ton of clothes that didn't fit her anymore (as well as a bunch of other things) to try out and experiment with, which will be nice, especially in terms of money, since two weeks ago I owned exactly zero pieces of women's clothing. I think I'm gonna let my hair grow out again but it's really thick and tends to have a mind of its own, so I imagine I'll need professional advice and probably product to get it looking a way I like, though the wig route might be simpler. Laughing

Forest Shepherd wrote:Hey just wanted to stop by and say good luck with things and I hope you continue to grow into your own person throughout the coming years. Smile

Thank you, Forest! I really appreciate you popping in. Being able to talk about this on Forumshire and having everyone be cool with it has been a great feeling. Smile
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Post by Forest Shepherd Sat Sep 29, 2018 5:38 am

I'd be surprised by any other reaction!

(coughcough by the by if you're going to be around more you should come make an eldritch horror in the new RtD)

Anyhoo, the nice thing about purses is their functionality. I went through a phase where I wanted to carry more change on my person, and loose-in-the-pockets just doesn't work very well: most of it just ends up under my seat in the truck.

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Post by Eldy Sat Sep 29, 2018 5:49 am

Well, y'all know what a worrier I am. Nothing personal. Razz

I was always a fan of cargo shorts in the summer (yeah yeah, I know), so I could carry a fair bit, but definitely not as much as even a small-ish purse. Plus, the pockets on women's jeans are not at all up to the task of holding modern smartphones, especially not phablets my current one. The aforementioned person I know gave me a few different crossbody bags to try out which I think will be more convenient since I won't have to dedicate a hand to holding it.
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Post by Norc Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:40 am

about razor burns! I thought to send it personal to you, Eldy, but i guess you all need to know this.

1) one should never feel one have to shave, regardless of gender and hairyness. 

2) disclaimer: i am not a very hairy person, but i have shaved parts of my body and know razor burns are hell. 

3) but if you are gonna do it. here are some tip to try and avoid them! They are caused by a number of things, ingrown hair, dirty razors, cuts in the skin etc.


  •  The bathub, really good idea. or a long warm shower. the hairs will soften. 
  • do a body-scrub first, exfoliate! essential! removing the top layer of dead skin will prevent it from getting in the razor and reaching the hairs will be easier. a smoother shave. 
  • use a lubricant while shaving such as shaving cream! the site i was looking at suggests soap, but soap is drying and often filled with perfume. Use a proper, mild shaving cream. i've found using shaving cream for the intimate areas works the best for me (the ones found where you buy sex toys! yes!)
  • Do not pull and strecth the skin apart to get to certain areas. it is tempting, but avoid it. 
  • this is important: shave in the directions of the hairs, not against! if the hair grows downwards on your leg, go downwards. i know all gilette commercials show it opposite, but it is a common myth. You get a closer shave, yes, but the risk of razor burn is a lot higher. 
  • Use light, short strokes. don't put too much pressure on it.
  • rinse the blade between strokes. don't use a blade clogged with hairs and cream and skin. if you are shaving a lot, change the blade too. I am guessing if you used one disposable for your whole body it would be pretty dull after a while. you want to use the sharpes of the sharpes. because...
  • avoid shaving the same area over and over (sharp blade here is key).
  • after. rinse with cold water og lay a cold washclothe over to close the pores. this is hell if you've just been in the shower, so my other option is:
  • rinse away the cream and use an after shave. going back to the sex-shop shaving cream, they probably have an after shave in the same series . it stings, but it works really well in my opinion. basically evaporates as it is almost pure alcohol.
  • for some time afterwards, be naked or as naked as you can. skip tight underwear, do bathrobe or loose pants, nothing tight. 
  • when you are sure the pores are closed (if you still feel warm, they probably aren't). MOISTURIZE! 
  • replace the razor.




and then, difference between razor bumps and razor burns:
https://www.healthline.com/health/beauty-skin-care/razor-burn wrote:

[size=38]Is razor burn the same thing as razor bumps?

Although the terms are used interchangeably, razor burn and razor bumps are generally considered different conditions. A razor burn is caused after you shave, and razor bumps are the result of shaved hairs growing back and becoming ingrown.
Ingrown hairs may look like raised bumps or even acne. This may occur when you remove hair through methods such as shaving, tweezing, or waxing. When the hair grows back, it curls into your skin instead of away from your skin.
Similar to razor burn, razor bumps can cause tenderness, inflammation, and a red rash.
Razor bumps are more common in people with curly hair, because the hair is more likely to curl back into the skin. A more severe version of razor bumps is known as pseudofolliculitis barbae. This condition occurs in up to 60 percent of African American men and in others with curly hair. In severe situations, this condition may require your doctor’s advice and treatment.
[/size]

[size=38]Outlook

In most cases, razor burn will clear up within a few days without treatment. Razor bumps may take longer to clear, and you should avoid shaving while bumps are present.
If the affected area appears to be infected, or doesn’t clear up within reasonable time frame, consult your doctor. Chronically occurring razor burn or razor bumps should also be treated by a doctor.
In some cases, your rash may not result from razor burn or razor bumps. If you suspect you have a rash unrelated to shaving or that a product you used to shave caused an allergic reaction, contact your doctor.[/size]

this was from own experience and this site: https://www.healthline.com/health/beauty-skin-care/razor-burn
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Post by Eldy Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:49 am

Thank you for the advice, Norc! ^_^ For starters I've been using the same shaving gel I use on my face which has worked well enough so far, but I might look into something else later. Exfoliation is very new to me but I've started trying to do that and my skin does feel a bit smoother already, and my most recent leg-shaving didn't result in nearly as much irritation. I will admit to having sometimes disregarded the advice to go with the grain of the hairs though. :V I was thinking about trying aftershave and with your advice will probably do that, and wait longer to moisturize than I'd been doing.
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Post by Norc Sat Sep 29, 2018 9:28 am

Eldy wrote:Thank you for the advice, Norc! ^_^ For starters I've been using the same shaving gel I use on my face which has worked well enough so far, but I might look into something else later. Exfoliation is very new to me but I've started trying to do that and my skin does feel a bit smoother already, and my most recent leg-shaving didn't result in nearly as much irritation. I will admit to having sometimes disregarded the advice to go with the grain of the hairs though. :V I was thinking about trying aftershave and with your advice will probably do that, and wait longer to moisturize than I'd been doing.
i too shave my legs in the opposite direction because i like the feel of it, the tight shave, but then just remember, light strokes, clean and new/sharp razor Smile if you got loooong hairs, it might be an idea to first go down and then up. i think leghairs are safer to shave though, as they are quite soft both in men and women.
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Post by Pettytyrant101 Sat Sep 29, 2018 9:44 am

as they are quite soft both in men and women- Norc

{{Dunno about that the hairs on my legs are like a hedgehogs arse Evil or Very Mad }}

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Post by Norc Sat Sep 29, 2018 9:45 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:as they are quite soft both in men and women- Norc

{{Dunno about that the hairs on my legs are like a hedgehogs arse Evil or Very Mad }}
but they're not pubes though?


ok.. i might not know shit about this...
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Post by Pettytyrant101 Sat Sep 29, 2018 10:00 am

{{No all the advice you gave seems perfectly sound to me Norc- just probably doesn't all apply to hairy arsed crabbit Scotshobbits with legs you could grate cheese on Smile  }}}

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Post by Mrs Figg Sat Sep 29, 2018 6:12 pm

Pettytyrant101 wrote:{{No all the advice you gave seems perfectly sound to me Norc- just probably doesn't all apply to hairy arsed crabbit Scotshobbits with legs you could grate cheese on Smile  }}}

too much info affraid
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Post by azriel Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:19 pm

Mrs Figg wrote:
Pettytyrant101 wrote:{{No all the advice you gave seems perfectly sound to me Norc- just probably doesn't all apply to hairy arsed crabbit Scotshobbits with legs you could grate cheese on Smile  }}}

too much info affraid


Oh I don't know ? could be handy for sanding walls & paint work down ? Very Happy

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Post by malickfan Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:22 pm

Pettytyrant101 wrote:{{No all the advice you gave seems perfectly sound to me Norc- just probably doesn't all apply to hairy arsed crabbit Scotshobbits with legs you could grate cheese on Smile  }}}

I wouldn't put it past you to try No

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Post by halfwise Sun Sep 30, 2018 5:08 am

What the hell did I miss today?! :scared:

Oh, I'll jump in too. Long body hair is like a beard. You trim it down with an electric trimmer first (not electric razor) before you attack it with a blade.

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Post by Eldy Fri Jun 28, 2019 6:42 am

Hi again!

Hope everyone is doing well. It's been a busy and exhausting few months on my end. I'm still a mess (as always) but things are maybe hopefully evening out somewhat, at least for the time being. I'm about to drop out of grad school, but on the plus side I've been on Hormone Replacement Therapy for three months now and I just recently got a mod gig on my main forum, so there's that. Razz And I've continued to intermittently lurk here despite otherwise cutting ties with Tolkien fandom, so I figured I might as well check in.
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Post by Forest Shepherd Fri Jun 28, 2019 7:40 am

A non-Tolkien forum?!

Surprised

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Post by Eldy Fri Jun 28, 2019 7:49 am

A science fiction one at that! Shocked

(Well, sort of; it has a pretty broad remit. I joined last year with an eye towards the creative writing section but ended up spending much of my time in the news and politics subforum. Still better than the video game forum where I have several thousand posts despite barely playing video games. Laughing)
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Post by Pettytyrant101 Fri Jun 28, 2019 8:24 am

{{ Eldy! cheers So glad to see you back lass, even if you have apparently been tarting it with other forums Mad Hope your planning to stick around again Nod }}

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Post by Eldy Fri Jun 28, 2019 8:38 am

Thanks, Petty! Smile I'm pretty much posting on a whim right now and there's a lot that I would like to get done before leaving for a family vacation in a few weeks (trying to escape from that is part of why I'm here Razz), but we'll see how much I drop in.
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Post by Pettytyrant101 Fri Jun 28, 2019 12:20 pm

{{ Well dont think going on vacation gets you off the hook! We'll be expecting some pictures of that Nod  And having somewhere to escape to is precisely what Forumshire is for my friend! It's about time we all got back in the Duck 'n' Muck for a duckie! (if I can remember how you squeeze them right!) }}

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Post by Bluebottle Thu Jul 04, 2019 1:59 am

Eldy is back Shocked

Wait... so am I Shocked

Hang in there, if higher education is for you, you'll find your niche and get to the end of it at some point. Nod

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Post by Mrs Figg Thu Jul 04, 2019 12:35 pm

Wave hi Eldy
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