The Brendon Chronicles

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Post by Tinuviel Sat Jul 06, 2013 11:52 pm

So I'm jumping on the band wagon here and have decided to contribute to the fantastic literature on this forum. This, however, is not fantastic literature. I've been telling my younger sisters stories involving my favorite singer Brendon Urie and his battles against Peter Jackson, where Brendon goes into different stories and changes the plot created by PJ. There are usually several different characters from different stories interacting in one. Since they've been so popular with the little ones, I thought why not try writing them? So here it goes!


Brendon was briskly walking down the sidewalk in San Diego, hurrying to get home from the recording studio to catch Doctor Who. Though he was a pop culture icon, he could never hide the inner nerd that threatened to ruin his emo image. He wore his favorite red rimmed ray band glasses and carried his olive green sachel full of sheet music and Dungeons and Dragons books at his side. He was walking so quickly that he almost missed it, but he spotted the giant blue Avatar poster in his peripherals. He moonwalked backward and pivoted around so he was nose to nose with the poster. It had the Avatar title on it with a picture of the machine Jake Sully used to slip into his avatar.
"What's this?" he said, squinting his eyes. "Come in and try our brand new AUTHENTIC avatar machine! Put yourself into any story for only ten bucks an hour! TEN BUCKS?" he exclaimed, "FUCK YEAH!" Brendon sprinted into the shop, knocking down the bell swinging before the door. He slammed into the front desk and started pounding on the surface.
"Ju-Just a second!" came a husky british voice. Brendon imaptiently tapped his foot as his big brown eyes frantically scanned the room. It was set up like a book store, only all the books looked like comics. He saw a version of Narnia on display with a cartoon version of Aslan karate chopping the stone table. That wasn't right. On the wall behind the desk was a large banner that read "PJ's Comic Book Store." Just as his eyes left the banner, a man suddenly appeared before him. Brendon jumped back in alarm.
"Hell-o there. How can I eh help you?" The man was short and fat, wearing a collared shirt and a black vest that had a ring sewed onto the right pocket. His hair was salt and pepper and looked as though he'd used a cow tongue to comb it. He had beedy green eyes that made Brendon feel as though this pathetic little man was capable of horrendous things.
"Um, yeah. I saw your ad for the Avatar machine? I'd like to try it."
"Oh oh oh! Yes yes, come on around." The man walked back behind a curtain. Brendon hopped over the desk and followed him. It was a dark room behind the curtain, the only source of light coming from the glowing coffin in the center of the room. He assumed this was the machine.
"How does it work?" he asked, extending a hand out to touch it. The man immediately swatted his hand away with a long john donut.
"Don't touch it! I had to sell all of my good animators to James Cameron to get this!"
"Sorry," Brendon muttered, licking the chocolate from his wrist.
"Now, pick a story."
"Any story?"
"Yeea."
"And then what?'
"Then I put you into it."
"Just like that?"
"yeep." The man turned around to for a second, and that's when Brendon saw it. The "Day 122" etched in gold on the back of his vest gave away everything.
"Wait, you're Peter Jackson! You- How- What are you doing HERE?"
"Oh nothing really, just making more of my own versions of classic stories. I'm working on a new version of Narnia as we speak!"
"Ya, I saw that." Brendon had an uncomfortable feeling that more PJ versions of stories would be a very, very bad thing. He decided then what he had to do, to save fandoms everywhere. But first he had to beat the pompous director at his own game.
"I'd like to go into Lord of the Rings pleease."
PJ spun around. "What?"
"Ya, why not? You did such a great job with them after all!"
Since PJ had an easily inflatable ego, Brendon's flattery won him over. "Alright. In you go." He pressed a button and the machine hissed open, steam rising from it.
Brendon gulped. "Has anyone else gone in here before?"
"Nope. You'll be the first!" He said, cackling to himself.
Brendon climbed in and laid down. He was so excited he couldn't contain himself.
"Oh, by the way, there's one rule."
"Yes?"
"No changing my plot."
Before Brendon could respond, the lid closed on him and his mind was whisked off to Middle Earth.

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Sun Jul 07, 2013 12:02 am

cheers Love the premise Tin! Love the writing.
More please! Nod 

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Post by Annette O Fish Sun Jul 07, 2013 12:12 am

This is super neat.
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Post by Eldorion Sun Jul 07, 2013 1:12 am

I think I like where this is heading. Laughing Can't wait to see what comes of PJ and Brendon meddling in Middle-earth. Very Happy
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Post by azriel Sun Jul 07, 2013 9:48 am

Is it the weather or summat ? But the stories are flying out thick & fast. This is a great beginning & another one to enjoy, Im so looking forward to seeing IF PJ gets....well, I dont want to anticipate anything on this one, spoil the fun !
I hadnt heard of Brendon Urie before, so I youtubed him & I like ! reminded me of MCR ? The video to "I write Sins not Tragedies" was really good.

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Post by Tinuviel Mon Jul 08, 2013 9:28 pm

He's a pretty cool dude Metal 
Sooooo onwards I guess?

He woke up in the middle of a grass road, the sun blinding his already blurred vision. It was a good thing his ears worked fine though, otherwise he wouldn't have heard low melodic singing and the clopping of horses hooves heading in his direction. He lifted up his head and squinted to see the cart only a few yards away from him. Brendon scrambled to his feet and held up his hands. "STOP!!!" He heard the old man say "Woah, woah" and the horse came to a stop.
"What on earth are you doing down there?" he said sharply, hopping down from his cart.
"Holy Shit! You're Gandalf!"
"That is one of my names, usually only known to those I know well. You, I do not know at all."
Brendon scraped his mind for an explanation for his outlandishness. He was still in his street clothes and still had his sachel. "One second," he said, digging through the many books he kept in his man purse. He'd swiped a bunch of Tolkien books from behind the counter before he'd entered the room just by mere coincidence. He found his copy of Unfinished Tales and saw the picture of the two blue wizards on the cover. He grinned and fixed his posture, so he looked as confident as Gandalf.
"I'm surprised you don't recognize me old friend! Then again, me and my bro disappeared East a long time ago, and we've changed alot. You have too! Looks like that beard of yours is growing in nicely!"
"You're telling me you're one of the Blue Wizards?"
"That I am! I've been sent to aid you in the coming months with a certain quest."
"Quest you say? Regarding what?"
"You'll find out tonight if I'm correct. You're going to have these impulses to do things that you really shouldn't, like, say... get in a full out battle with Saruman--"
"Saruman?!"
"Ok, that's spoiling a bit too much, but trust me, serious shit's about to go down. And I'd think fast if I were you."
"Why is that?" said the wizard, bewildered by the sudden turn of events.
"Incoming hobbit at...erm..." Too late. Frodo barreled into Gandalf, knocking the old wizard off his feet. "Sorry, I don't remember much about clocks. Everything's digital now, ya know?" Gandalf only mumbled from underneath Frodo."Right, I guess you wouldn't... well, speaking of time, I'll see you all in twenty years!"
"Twenty years?" Gandalf finally said, shoving the wide-eyed hobbit off of him.
"That's what it should be I think. Have fun at Bilbo's party!" With that, he walked down the road and pulled out his cell phone. "There's no way I'm gonna wait 20 years though!" He pressed the number for St. Johns, only to find he didn't have any reception. He climbed to the top of the party tree, where finally he got a bar. The phone rang for quite a while before he finally picked up.
"Eh-llo?"
"Hi Doctor, my name's Brendon Urie. I'm in an alternate dimension right now where basically anything I say goes, so that's how I got your number."
"Ah, got it! What can I help you with?"
"I need you to take me 20 years into the future, if you're not too busy."
"No not at all! Well, actually, I'm very busy but there's always time when you have a time machine, eh?"
"Thanks! I'm on top of the party tree in the Shire, Middle Earth."
"See you soon then!" And the Doctor hung up. Judging by the sound of his voice, Brendon assumed it to be the 11th Doctor. A few seconds later, the Tardis hovered next to the party tree. A rope ladder fell from the doorway, and Brendon climbed up and in.

***

The Shire didn't change much in 20 years, but then again, when did it ever change? Brendon hoped that he himself was in charge of the story, so that if he knocked on the door of Bag End, Frodo would still be there. As he walked down among the quiet streets of Hobbiton, he couldn't help but notice the dark thunder clouds appearing overhead. A boom of thunder shook the sky, and Brendon swore he could hear a voice in it, but he shrugged it off and hopped over the gate to Bag End. He knocked on the door, and an older, plumper Frodo answered it.
"Perfect! You're still here!"
"Who are you?" he asked.
"I'm Brendon! I'm like Gandalf. Speaking of, has he stopped by to ask about you're ring yet?"
"SHHHH!" Frodo scolded, then he beckoned Brendon inside and closed and locked the door.
"I have to leave soon with Sam, tonight actually! I'm about to move to Buckland."
"Even better! Though make sure you take Pippin with too."
"Why?"
"You're just supposed to. You know how to get to Rivendell?"
"Yes, take the ferry to Bree, right?"
"NO no NO! That's what He wants you to do. No you take the ferry to the Old Forest, then you're going to meet a great guy, Bombadil, then you're gonna get attacked by Barrow Weights, I think, then you get to Bree. I, however, will see you in Bree." More thunder rolled, and this time Brendon heard his name.
"Did you hear that?" Brendon asked Frodo, but the hobbit only shrugged, so Brendon shrugged it off as well. "Alright, I'll see you soon little buddy!" As he let himself out, he stopped and turned around, remembering a key part of the plot. "Oh, and by the way, if you get tempted by the ring, for God's sake, try to keep a straight face!" With that, he walked out the door. The sky now was pitch black and cracks of thunder and lightning were everywhere. This time, there was no doubting that there was a voice in the thunder, and this time, the message was loud and clear.
"BRENDON!" It boomed, "STOP RUINING THE PLOT!"

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Tue Jul 09, 2013 1:59 am

"Sorry, I don't remember much about clocks. Everything's digital now, ya know?"

The thought of Gandalf saying that cracked me up! Very Happy 

And the Doctor tooo! cheers 

Loving it Tin-keep correcting those PJ mistakes!!

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Pure Publications, The Tower of Lore and the Former Admin's Office are Reasonably Proud to Present-



A Green And Pleasant Land

Compiled and annotated by Eldy.

- get your copy here for a limited period- free*

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view



*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales
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Post by Orwell Tue Jul 09, 2013 2:41 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:"Sorry, I don't remember much about clocks. Everything's digital now, ya know?"

The thought of Gandalf saying that cracked me up! Very Happy 

Maybe you've mixing up Gandalf with Merlin in T.H. White's "The Sword in the Stone," Tin? Very Happy 

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Post by Mrs Figg Tue Jul 09, 2013 12:00 pm

cheers  this is great
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Post by Orwell Thu Jul 11, 2013 12:59 am

That's what I think too! Shocked 

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