Agent Nora and the Poisonous Plums

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Post by Norc Wed Jul 03, 2013 2:19 pm

Laughing this is great shit !
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Post by Eldorion Wed Jul 03, 2013 3:20 pm

This isn't going any of the places I thought it would, but I like being surprised by stories! Can't wait for more. Very Happy
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Post by Norc Wed Jul 03, 2013 4:25 pm

Figg always surprises Very Happy that's the great part ^^
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Post by azriel Wed Jul 03, 2013 4:59 pm

Keep the creative juices flowing Mrs Figg ! Another great story to get immersed in ! Very Happy 

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Post by Mrs Figg Wed Jul 03, 2013 5:55 pm

just then a little man in a red flowing tunic came trotting up, he wiped his bald head with a very large green silk handkerchief, and stood there puffing.
''what are you all doing here?'' he huffed, ''all noble guests must be in the square for 1.00 o'clock sharp, dear dear me what will my Lord think, tut tut guests wandering about, and in disarray too''.
''Um, hello'', said Norc, ''where are we exactly? what is this place?''
they all looked at him expectantly. He stopped in his tracks, his eyes popping in disbelief.
''My dear Lady, you are in the great town of Minas Tyrn''.
He puffed out his chest like a pidgeon, and waved his hanky at them.
''really. such jokes, such japes, but theres no time to waste, come along come along, follow me''
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Post by Norc Wed Jul 03, 2013 6:00 pm

Very Happy
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Post by CC12 35 Wed Jul 03, 2013 7:32 pm

this cc sounds annoying

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Post by Amarië Wed Jul 03, 2013 7:47 pm

You are so good at painting pictures with words, Figgy! I love you 

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Post by Mrs Figg Wed Jul 03, 2013 8:40 pm

Embarassed thanks
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Post by azriel Wed Jul 03, 2013 8:40 pm

No blushing now, its true !
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Post by Mrs Figg Wed Jul 03, 2013 9:04 pm

The little man trotted off again his small legs working hard under his long tunic.
''well I suggest we follow him'' said Dave, ''unless you have any better ideas''.
''what if its a trap'' said Halfy.
''its undoubtedly a trap'', said Petty with a frown.
''oh for goodness sakes'' said Figgs.
''If they have Ribena they can use me as a boy toy for all I care'' said Lance.
''come on then, before we lose him'' said Azriel, setting off down the lane.
They followed trailing in a gaggle, each person lost in thought. Not long later they heard drums in the distance and the sound of many peoples voice, first a hum and then they turned a corner and a wall of sound hit their ears. They were in a large town square, faced on all sides with tall tower buildings, in each tower were open windows and terraces, balconies with brightly dressed people all talking and laughing. flags and banners fluttered and Music was playing, the instruments were drums flutes and Crumhorns,
''gosh I do love ancient music'' said Halfy, ''just look at that Sackbutt''
''never mind the chicks'' said Eldo, ''lets find out whats going on''.
Halfy sadly followed turning every so often to catch a glimpse of the musicians.
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Post by Eldorion Wed Jul 03, 2013 9:40 pm

More, please! Very Happy
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Post by Lancebloke Wed Jul 03, 2013 10:17 pm

Am I just gonna get Ribena jokes? Suspect
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Post by Mrs Figg Wed Jul 03, 2013 10:19 pm

''stick together peeps'' said Raddy.
''dont worry my Ranger skills are kicking in'' said RA or Rodney to his friends.
''its like this with the MERPS, my herding is legendary''

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Post by Orwell Thu Jul 04, 2013 12:30 am

Lancebloke wrote:Am I just gonna get Ribena jokes? Suspect

I fear you have just consigned a sad Fate upon thyself, Lance. Very Happy

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Post by Lancebloke Thu Jul 04, 2013 7:57 am

I know. The only option now is to drown my sorrows...

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Post by Orwell Thu Jul 04, 2013 12:04 pm

Spoken like a true Forumshiran. Very Happy 

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Post by Mrs Figg Thu Jul 04, 2013 12:29 pm

''I think we should create a meaningful dialogue with the local inhabitants'' said Orwell.
''whatever'' said Norc
''thats a good idea said Amarie, ''I will try first seeing as I have Embasadorial skills''.
''get on with it'' said Norc.
Amarie sidled upto the nearest person who was chattering to his neighbour.
''good day my fine fellow, what gives?''
The man stood goggling at Amarie, he was staring at her jeans avidly.
''poo he's giving me the creeps'' whispered Amarie to Figgs, ''I dont think women wear trousers here'' she replied, ''its most unfeminine, I told you to wear that nice A-line floral number''
''There be a weddin'' piped up an urchin, ''tis the Lord Tyrn he be weddin Queen Tinuviel from the Gulf of Golff''.
''there be a feastin and a dancin and cake'' he nodded fervently and skipped off into the crowd.
''useful urchin'' said Petty, ''that reminds me, I am starving''.
They pushed their way slowly through the throng of tipsy merry makers, there were jugglers and fire eaters, dancing ladies in flimsy garments with bells tied to their ankles.
The others had to grab Lance and Orwell by the scruff of the neck to stop them chatting up the Painted harlots that frequently buttonholed them.
Lance seemed to have completely forgotten his annoying Ribena fixation. Dave gently explained that the 'ladies' were actually not.
''well how was I to know under all that slap'' said Orwell,'' its an easy mistake to make....I remember one time in Singapore......
CC looked thunderous and grabbed Lance by his lughole and marched him off away from the temptation.
They threaded their way to the centre of the square where long wooden tables covered in red and gold cloth were ladened with delicious grub.
''Lets find 13 seats'', said Petty, ''my tummy is growling for something fried''.
''oooh look at these napkin rings they are solid gold!'' cried Figgs, ''this gives me aesthetic inspiration for our nuptuals Petty''.
The look of disgust and horror on Pettys face was a sight to see.
''och wist woman I ain buyin geegaws the noo!'' He always became incoherently Scottish when he was upset.
Figgs looked sadly at the napkin rings and stealthily sneeked a couple in her bag while no one was looking.


Last edited by Mrs Figg on Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:52 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Post by azriel Thu Jul 04, 2013 12:32 pm

Good girl Mrs Figg, nick what you can !

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Agent Nora and the Poisonous Plums - Page 8 Jean-b11
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Post by Amarië Thu Jul 04, 2013 12:41 pm

It clearly had to be the jeans that was was the problem, that was a flawless piece of conversation skill that! Text book example. Crazy locals.

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Post by CC12 35 Thu Jul 04, 2013 1:26 pm

in my dream kitchen there would be a hot tap, a cold tap and a ribena tap. maybe a hot ribena tap too #ccmusings

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Post by Norc Thu Jul 04, 2013 2:23 pm

love it!! Very Happy
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Post by Eldorion Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:56 pm

Can't wait for more! Very Happy I want to know who the Lord Tyrn is. And I'm loving the setting so far. Cool
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Post by Lancebloke Thu Jul 04, 2013 4:51 pm

A ribena tap? You expecting me over at some point?
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Post by Wisey Banks Fri Jul 05, 2013 1:57 am

Once upon a nary moment
(caught out of time)
i wandered in a Forum
(or pantomime)
and while i tarried
(about quart to nine)
I met a fiery fierce
old love of mine

"Forsooth!
I once knew you
bibliclee
under an awning
by the sea
are you still
my sunlit white skinned elf?
or have i confused you
for someone else?"

"Shut it,"
she said
(yes
it was her
of whom
I'd guessed!)
"I'm writing things
from out my head,
shut the fuck -
I'll lose my thread!"

"Ho! what a coincidence
for others e'en now
are writing
as you write
is Forumshire now a
multi-storied
firmanent
bursting bright?"

"Of course it is
you dickhead -
now
whip off your trousers,
it's time for bed!"

Ah! Forumshire -
(or so it's said...)


Errol Flynn: "Unknown Discourses."

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