what sort of jokes can I get away with?

+10
Mrs Figg
chris63
Orwell
Amariƫ
Pettytyrant101
halfwise
Ally
Eldorion
Norc
azriel
14 posters

Page 37 of 40 Previous  1 ... 20 ... 36, 37, 38, 39, 40  Next

Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Ally Fri Apr 26, 2013 10:26 pm

The joke is a jug and the dream is a band.

_________________
SHUT UP CAROLINE.

Ally
Wannabe Beard

Posts : 2789
Join date : 2011-02-13
Age : 30
Location : they/them

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Norc Fri Apr 26, 2013 10:46 pm

David H wrote:And why is the sky blue? Sometimes the world doesn't have simple answers, honey. Rolling Eyes

erm.. the skie is blue because it's the blue light that reaches shortest. when the sun goes down, the light has to go farther and therefore red. or something like that.
Norc
Norc
Khaleesi

Posts : 19247
Join date : 2011-12-21
Age : 29

http://nimrail.deviantart.com

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by David H Fri Apr 26, 2013 10:49 pm

Exactly my point! Nod
David H
David H
Horsemaster, Fighting Bears in the Pacific Northwest

Posts : 7194
Join date : 2011-11-18

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:02 pm

A newlywed couple on their honeymoon prepares to see each other naked for the first time.

The husband exposes his knotted and twisted feet. He explains, "I had tolio as a child."

The wife asks if he means polio. He says, "No, it only affects the toes."

He removes his pants and reveals deformed knees. He admits, "I had kneesles, too."

Finally, he pulls off his boxers. In shock, the woman gasps, "Oh no -- smallcox, too!"

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by halfwise Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:04 pm

Norc wrote:
David H wrote:And why is the sky blue? Sometimes the world doesn't have simple answers, honey. Rolling Eyes

erm.. the skie is blue because it's the blue light that reaches shortest. when the sun goes down, the light has to go farther and therefore red. or something like that.

Umm...err...NO.

Blue waves are shorter than red waves. Since the air molecules are smaller than both, blue will be scattered more because it's closer to the size of the molecules (ever note how ocean waves pass right by you but ripples don't? There will be flat water behind your body when a ripple hits it). So some of the blue gets scattered in all directions, giving us a blue sky. It's a small fraction so you don't notice it missing from the sunlight.

When the sun goes down the light is passing slantwise through the atmosphere, accentuating the effect. Now you notice the blue IS missing, and what's left is red. Dust etc increases this effect.

Or you could say blue is a boy so it doesn't ask directions and goes wandering all over the place...

_________________
Halfwise, son of Halfwit. Brother of Nitwit, son of Halfwit. Half brother of Figwit.
Then it gets complicated...
halfwise
halfwise
Quintessence of Burrahobbitry

Posts : 20542
Join date : 2012-02-01
Location : rustic broom closet in farthing of Manhattan

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Norc Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:07 pm

great explenation Halfy, that's what i meant.
Norc
Norc
Khaleesi

Posts : 19247
Join date : 2011-12-21
Age : 29

http://nimrail.deviantart.com

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:07 pm

An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas. Fortunately, the farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 10 times since I've been here, and I bet you didn't even notice!"

The doctor says, "I see. Take these pills and come back next week."

The next week the old lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my silent farts stink like the dickens."

The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Norc Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:10 pm

Laughing
Norc
Norc
Khaleesi

Posts : 19247
Join date : 2011-12-21
Age : 29

http://nimrail.deviantart.com

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Mrs Figg Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:17 pm

Laughing
Mrs Figg
Mrs Figg
Eel Wrangler from Bree

Posts : 25841
Join date : 2011-10-06
Age : 94
Location : Holding The Door

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Fri Apr 26, 2013 11:36 pm

A senior citizen was driving down the freeway when his wife called his cell phone.

"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"

"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by David H Sat Apr 27, 2013 2:47 am

halfwise wrote:
Norc wrote:
David H wrote:And why is the sky blue? Sometimes the world doesn't have simple answers, honey. Rolling Eyes

erm.. the skie is blue because it's the blue light that reaches shortest. when the sun goes down, the light has to go farther and therefore red. or something like that.

Umm...err...NO.

Blue waves are shorter than red waves. Since the air molecules are smaller than both, blue will be scattered more because it's closer to the size of the molecules (ever note how ocean waves pass right by you but ripples don't? There will be flat water behind your body when a ripple hits it). So some of the blue gets scattered in all directions, giving us a blue sky. It's a small fraction so you don't notice it missing from the sunlight.

When the sun goes down the light is passing slantwise through the atmosphere, accentuating the effect. Now you notice the blue IS missing, and what's left is red. Dust etc increases this effect.

Or you could say blue is a boy so it doesn't ask directions and goes wandering all over the place...

Or you could argue that the sky isn't actually Blue.
It's actually Grey.
It only appears to be blue at certain times! Twisted Evil

[[see what I mean CC? No simple answers. Just like pink assault weapons.]]
David H
David H
Horsemaster, Fighting Bears in the Pacific Northwest

Posts : 7194
Join date : 2011-11-18

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by chris63 Sat Apr 27, 2013 10:59 am

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 13%2B-%2B1

_________________
what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Z93Cq
chris63
chris63
Adventurer

Posts : 8748
Join date : 2011-07-04
Location : Perth, Australia

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Norc Sat Apr 27, 2013 11:10 am

lol!
Norc
Norc
Khaleesi

Posts : 19247
Join date : 2011-12-21
Age : 29

http://nimrail.deviantart.com

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Sat Apr 27, 2013 1:26 pm

Laughing Laughing

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Ally Sat Apr 27, 2013 3:01 pm

David H wrote:
halfwise wrote:
Norc wrote:
David H wrote:And why is the sky blue? Sometimes the world doesn't have simple answers, honey. Rolling Eyes

erm.. the skie is blue because it's the blue light that reaches shortest. when the sun goes down, the light has to go farther and therefore red. or something like that.

Umm...err...NO.

Blue waves are shorter than red waves. Since the air molecules are smaller than both, blue will be scattered more because it's closer to the size of the molecules (ever note how ocean waves pass right by you but ripples don't? There will be flat water behind your body when a ripple hits it). So some of the blue gets scattered in all directions, giving us a blue sky. It's a small fraction so you don't notice it missing from the sunlight.

When the sun goes down the light is passing slantwise through the atmosphere, accentuating the effect. Now you notice the blue IS missing, and what's left is red. Dust etc increases this effect.

Or you could say blue is a boy so it doesn't ask directions and goes wandering all over the place...

Or you could argue that the sky isn't actually Blue.
It's actually Grey.
It only appears to be blue at certain times! Twisted Evil

[[see what I mean CC? No simple answers. Just like pink assault weapons.]]


Did anyone actually get the joke?

_________________
SHUT UP CAROLINE.

Ally
Wannabe Beard

Posts : 2789
Join date : 2011-02-13
Age : 30
Location : they/them

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Eldorion Sat Apr 27, 2013 3:43 pm

Ally wrote:Did anyone actually get the joke?

Actually I missed it the first time I read through this page. Laughing
Eldorion
Eldorion
You're Gonna Carry That Weight

Posts : 23311
Join date : 2011-02-13
Age : 30
Location : Maryland, United States

https://purl.org/tolkien

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by David H Sat Apr 27, 2013 7:13 pm

Ally wrote:Did anyone actually get the joke?

joke? scratch
David H
David H
Horsemaster, Fighting Bears in the Pacific Northwest

Posts : 7194
Join date : 2011-11-18

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by CC12 35 Sat Apr 27, 2013 7:26 pm


_________________
it's not that serious Caroline
CC12 35
CC12 35
Gypsy gal, the hands of Harlem

Posts : 3085
Join date : 2012-10-27

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by David H Sat Apr 27, 2013 8:00 pm

David H
David H
Horsemaster, Fighting Bears in the Pacific Northwest

Posts : 7194
Join date : 2011-11-18

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Sat Apr 27, 2013 10:15 pm

I enjoyed that Dave ! Nod

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by Ally Sat Apr 27, 2013 10:24 pm

I always thought that The Wall was a grossly overrated album piggybacking off that song.

_________________
SHUT UP CAROLINE.

Ally
Wannabe Beard

Posts : 2789
Join date : 2011-02-13
Age : 30
Location : they/them

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by chris63 Tue Apr 30, 2013 5:11 am

Well said, i agree Thumbs Up

_________________
what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Z93Cq
chris63
chris63
Adventurer

Posts : 8748
Join date : 2011-07-04
Location : Perth, Australia

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by chris63 Tue Apr 30, 2013 6:09 am

Once there were two farmers. One had a daughter and the other had a son. When their kids were teenagers they started dating, and the two farmers encouraged it. One day the girl's father went over to the other farmer's house and said that he didn't want their children dating anymore. The boy's father asked, "Why not?"

The other farmer said, "Come here and I'll show you." In his yard was the girl's name written in pee in the snow.

The boy's father said, "Oh, come on, that's just boy stuff."

The other farmer said, "You think I don't know my own daughter's handwriting?"

_________________
what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Z93Cq
chris63
chris63
Adventurer

Posts : 8748
Join date : 2011-07-04
Location : Perth, Australia

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by azriel Tue Apr 30, 2013 12:53 pm

lol!

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Jean-b11
azriel
azriel
Grumpy cat, rub my tummy, hear me purr

Posts : 15648
Join date : 2012-10-07
Age : 64
Location : in a galaxy, far,far away, deep in my own imagination.

Back to top Go down

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Empty Re: what sort of jokes can I get away with?

Post by chris63 Thu May 02, 2013 6:48 am

what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 8ba598b8c58ed9d80ccf988114c57628

_________________
what sort of jokes can I get away with? - Page 37 Z93Cq
chris63
chris63
Adventurer

Posts : 8748
Join date : 2011-07-04
Location : Perth, Australia

Back to top Go down

Page 37 of 40 Previous  1 ... 20 ... 36, 37, 38, 39, 40  Next

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum