PETTY'S LADY

Its ok Halfwise way things are going there wont be anyone in Forumshire left alive- what is with the Banks goings on?
I think Orwell has flipped his wig, Im sure I saw Odo go into Mrs Figgs back entrance on my way here.

Its a small back entrance, I think I would notice.

..and Pettys ideal lady is Amy Pond, we need look no further.

poor Odo do you think magic Buckie will bring him back?

Ah well maybe, strange stuff the pure buckie when its in the hands of the wizards- put he has to want to come back, for his wives, or for jelly or his money- something.

I think the message (or mision) is clear... Sir Rupert is hellbent on killing ALL the Bankses. Dead! Stone dead! Gone! No more!

Last in: Wisey decapitated witn a pen-knife!

No! No! NO! WTF! Forumshire without channeling? Its unthinkable- Im going round there right now to gather up the bits and get him to the wizards! And if anyone sees that so called knight before me dont kill him- he's mine!

ORWELL DO SOMETHING!!!!! :rage
NO NOT WISEY!!!!!!!!please save him

How can I dream of the stars without Wisey?

Thereis hope Mrs Figg- the Buckie Brewing Wizards are Scots after all so they specialise in severe knife wounds.

{{{What has got into that knight? He was only supposed to blow the bloody buildings up!!}}}

Sorry chaps, gone ... gone... no more... Life goes on - for those of us who remain! Life is a veil of tears - we all know that.

Oh dear... Janesmith has been sent to Our Lady's in Rome.... Some scandal or something, about secret rites or something.... Times are a'changin' it seems.

Porgy has fled with a chap dressed all in black -- last seen heading back to Buckland where her folks are... Luckilly, I don't suppose she'll be missed much.

A most pecular dream I had last night... Kill Orwell the voice... kill him too! The voice then said, take yourself back to the Undying Lands ol' Sir Knight, your job done... I know not what it all means, alack aloo alas!

Im not standing for a forumshire without channeling! I'm just not accepting it!!

Hey, uh, Mr Knight Sir....how'd you like a nice skin of wine? No, not the white one, doesn't hide the...um....I think you'll be happier with this nice rich complex red. More complex than a few minutes ago - um - must be the breathing, yeah, that's it...it's been breathing.

Nice little sip. Free on the house.

{{{{{Oh dear, I hope this Sir Rupert fellow doesn't find me before I can reveal my true feelings to Petty! }}}}}

Me too Petty, we need channelin and we need it good.

Pettytyrant101 wrote: No! No! NO! WTF! Forumshire without channeling? Its unthinkable- Im going round there right now to gather up the bits and get him to the wizards! And if anyone sees that so called knight before me dont kill him- he's mine!

It worked with Wesley in the Princess Bride, please hurry Petty, just hurry.

I've put the bits into a (now soggy) cardboard box and left them with the wizards- who knows now? We shall have to wait and see.

{{and I did admittedly pay them 200 buckies if they would put Odo's head back on the wrong way round!}}}

Haha! That Orwell chap thought he could avoideth me by hiding under the bed... Well, the crows are pecking out his eyes even as we speak!

But Diamond? Diamond is it? Where for art thou, Diamond?

Sir Rupert Dashing wrote:Haha! That Orwell chap thought he could avoideth me by hiding under the bed... Well, the crows are pecking out his eyes even as we speak!

But Diamond? Diamond is it? Where for art thou, Diamond?

Stop this please. No birds are pecking out Orwell's eyes. He is safe with us. We are standing guard over him day and night. Please just go away. We are not a violent place. We are a place of friendship and kindness, outspoken yes, but kind. Please go back and leave us be.

Petty, it is working. The bits have melded and he sleeps peacefully. When he awakes,( I never thought I should be saying this, ever) he will need quite a bit of buckie to kill the pain and the horror . Then he has to stay with us too until this violent rampage is over. .

Buckie you say? well I suppose I could sell him a small amount at mates rates, well matish rates.

Just as surely ye are kind and gentle, leelee lass, the Bankses (and their pecular henchobbit Orwell) are dead and gone... gone.. finished.... Shed no tears, they had it coming. Eru said so so...


Now young Diamond where would it be you would wishus to meet me?

Diamond?.... Diamond...? oooh Diamond.... come out, come out... come out from wherever you are... I've got something forrrr you!

If I find you Sir Knight I am going to fill your suit with buckie and pig oil, remove your codpiece and use your old chap as a wick!