Dark Planet Day Challenge: Forumshire fanfic

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The Archet Bugle
Kafria
Tinuviel
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The Wobbit A Parody
Ringdrotten
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Post by Kafria Mon Feb 27, 2012 1:51 am

Thanks! I am really enjoying writing this way, think it may be my most natural style - particularly the descriptive bits, find the dialogue and action a bit harder (one of the reasons the first three sections were a bit slow I think!)

The inisfail stuff hit a snag when I realised what I was writing in style didn't fit with the saga feel the story had in my head. So this was a perfect opportunity to practice the style, while giving the other time to percolate, it also allows my to play with the idea of magic and transformation. One of the other things that became clear was I needed a clearer ritual tradition figuring out before the other could go further.

(Taranis = thunder too! sounds like a crabbit explosion to me Very Happy )

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Mon Feb 27, 2012 1:55 am

The whole transformation thing is the heart of Celtic stroytelling it works perfectly here in this context. You conjure up just the right atmosphere for me.

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Post by Eldorion Mon Feb 27, 2012 7:03 am

I love this story! Very Happy I'm not particularly familiar with the Celtic genre but I find your writing to be very evocative, Kafria. I like the portrayal of magic too. It feels natural within the setting and I don't think it's overpowered or anything. For what it's worth, I think your dialogue and action scenes turned out very well, too.

As for the mystery rescuer, it took me a moment since he was speaking clearly and didn't appear to be inebriated, but I can make an educated guess. study
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Post by Amarië Mon Feb 27, 2012 12:21 pm

Kafria, what can I do but join the choir of praise? I especially love that I have no idea where this story is heading (besides possibly to Germany), and that really adds to be beauty and mystery. I can feel the loneliness and hear the wind blowing through the grass when I read.

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Mon Feb 27, 2012 4:06 pm

As for the mystery rescuer, it took me a moment since he was speaking clearly and didn't appear to be inebriated- Eldo

Kafria has the eyes of a seer Eldo- she sees to the Celtic heart of the matter! Nod

_________________
Pure Publications, The Tower of Lore and the Former Admin's Office are Reasonably Proud to Present-



A Green And Pleasant Land

Compiled and annotated by Eldy.

- get your copy here for a limited period- free*

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view



*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales
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the crabbit will suffer neither sleight of hand nor half-truths. - Forest
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Post by Orwell Tue Feb 28, 2012 8:38 pm

Kafria wrote:


Isolation

...

“This village is now the property of Dark Enterprises, building safer homes for all. In the interest of safety and the most effective allocation of resources this village is now closed. All property held within is forfeit. In exchange you will be allocated rooms in our deluxe new town. In the interests of hygiene you will be expected to undergo a period of quarantine, after which you will be permitted entry to the city. Directions are on the parchment scroll attached.”

Having delivered its message, the scarecrow began to smoulder, burning away to reveal a scroll pinned to the stake.
Confused and befuddled the woman sank to the ground and dropped her head to her hands. She scrubbed her eyes, to no avail. Her shawl slipped to reveal red and gold scales glinting in the first rays of the rising sun.


Hope you like! Very Happy


As damning a piece as ever was writ about Dark Planet - and soooooo true! And you've partly revealed yourself I see.....ooooooooh....Nod

I do like, Mayor Kaf. cheers

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Post by Kafria Sat Mar 03, 2012 3:37 pm

Thanks for all the encouragement. I am enjoying taking those little flashes and embelishing

Next little section - I seem to only be able to visualise in short scenes so here is the next one!


Rue watched as the newcomer released his grip on Freya’s head and stepped back, running his eye along the fire barrier and turning through all four quadrants, to ensure it was complete. He puffed his cheeks out, expelling a rush of air.

“Daft dragon, what were you thinking?”

He threw up his arms as he turned away and began pacing between the fires, peering at the talismans buried in their heart and poking his finger into the discarded cauldron, sniffing his finger before tasting the few droplets that coated it. All the while he kept up his tirade at Freya.

“Unsheltered! Leaving everything outside? First thing they teach you, set the boundaries and secure the site first, you’re old enough to know that! Using the elemental invocations! Bound to draw attention, you must have known that, so why risk it? You didn’t seem that stupid! Is she just that stupid?” he asked, coming to a standstill in front of Rue.

“No,” Rue stuttered, eyes blinking rapidly as she found herself under scrutiny.

“So why?” he asked, gaze unwavering.

“I don’t….. who are you?” Rue took a step away, her legs giving way until she found herself propped up on her elbows, brows creased and mouth open in confusion. Her rescuer held her gaze for a moment, registering her confusion, before he scrubbed a hand through his unruly hair. He crouched on his heels and gave a lopsided smile.

“Taranis, met your mum at the village, before we all got split up. It’s Rue isn’t it?” He held out his hand.

The girl just looked at it blankly and he moved to sit beside her, giving her time to collect her scattered thoughts. Rue pushed herself up and grabbed her knees, hugging them tight. She concentrated on breathing deeply, eyes closed as she tried to remember everyone she had seen in the village, scenes flitting hurriedly across the dark void. Nothing, she took a sidelong glance to check. The blue marks on his skin were disappearing, she turned to be sure; his skin was rippling, blue swirls being swallowed by pale skin, the shock of red hair giving way to a tide of brown cascading from his scalp.

“You’re trustee!” Rues eyes narrowed with suspicion. He nodded, making her eyes swim slightly as his tattoos continued to shift and fade. When his features settled once more she finally recognised his face.

“You spoke to mum at the bonfire… upset her I think?” she accused.

“Might have done. I was prying,” he agreed, one hand reaching up to scratch the back of his neck.

“About what?” Rue wondered, eyes widening as she heard herself. Her cheeks flushed pink, making Taranis chuckle as he glanced at Rue, eyes crinkling in amusement.

“How much has your mum told you? About the trustees?” he asked, turning to face her.

“The histories, the turn and how we must hide,” she replied, somewhere between a statement and a question.

“How to harness your power?” he asked

“No, tonight was the first time. This…” she gestured around the Howe helplessly, unable to encompass the events of the night in simple words. The raw power, the potency of the elements, the intensity of the chant, all defied description.

“Surprised?” he laughed his smile widening as she nodded in agreement. “Did she tell you the village was supposed to be a refuge?” he continued. She shook her head and then stilled watching his hands, which never settled as he explained. “The village was founded as a place of safety for those who believed in freedom and self-expression. Not necessarily for Trustees, but inevitably we found our way there. We’ve all become very good at hiding our natures, even from each other, but after so long, I’ve begun to recognise the signs, spotted and made myself known to a few. I was trying to find out about you and your mum at the bonfire. She didn’t like me asking.”

“So how come you were here? You were all gone yesterday morning, but you got here in time to…..” Rue tailed off, shoulders twitching as a shadow of fear traced her spine.

“Was looking for you. Good job too,” he added, reaching out a hand and patting her shoulder. Rue tensed at the first contact and then relaxed as she accepted the comfort.

They sat like that for a while, the warrior reassuring the youngster, watching the never ending dance of the flames and the shadows they cast. The encircling fire wall began to die away, leaving a scored ring around the perimeter. The embers of the quadrants fires fell inwards, loosing clouds of sparks to float away into the lightening sky. The surrounding wood began to awake as birds called to one another and announced the arrival of a new day.


Smile

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Post by Amarië Sat Mar 03, 2012 5:13 pm

Another good piece! Nod

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Post by Amarië Sat Mar 03, 2012 5:44 pm

Hope Petty posts soon too...

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Post by Pettytyrant101 Sat Mar 03, 2012 5:47 pm

Continues to be very evocotive Kafria. You paint good pictures in the mind. Nod

Hopefully the next part will be up tonight at some point Amarie!

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Pure Publications, The Tower of Lore and the Former Admin's Office are Reasonably Proud to Present-



A Green And Pleasant Land

Compiled and annotated by Eldy.

- get your copy here for a limited period- free*

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yjYiz8nuL3LqJ-yP9crpDKu_BH-1LwJU/view



*Pure Publications reserves the right to track your usage of this publication, snoop on your home address, go through your bins and sell personal information on to the highest bidder.
Warning may contain Wholesome Tales
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the crabbit will suffer neither sleight of hand nor half-truths. - Forest
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Post by Amarië Sat Mar 03, 2012 6:04 pm

Yey!! cheers

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Post by Eldorion Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:51 pm

I've been eagerly awaiting the next installments of both stories, so it was great to get to see Kafria's and look forward to Petty's. Very Happy I feel like I might be missing out a bit due to my lack of familiarity Celtic legends and lore, but I love the latest update. I can't wait to find out more about what happened. study
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Post by Pettytyrant101 Wed Mar 07, 2012 3:08 am

Ok as this is a bit late in arriving its a bit of a bumper installment. Hope you enjoy though- have a cuppa with it or a buckie or two. Very Happy


'Remarkable' Odo thought to himself as he entered the Dark Planet lobby for the second time, young Eldo had been right, if you walked in the front door they let you, 'Remarkable that Eldo could be right, and him just a whippersnapper too'.
The smiling Brad was behind his shining desk. Odo approached, the small bulge in his trouser pocket his mini-palantir made seemed rudely conspicuous and he felt like he was walking as if he were a puppet having its strings pulled. His stomach was full of butterflies and felt like it was shaking like jelly, blueberry at that, his least favourite of the jellies. His skin felt sweaty, although that could be the lack of jelly of late as without it his allergies tended to come back, although he thought looking round at the blank sterility of the lobby, that should not be a problem here, his worst allegory was to cats but he not seen so much as a beetle here. And everyone knew Eru loved a beetle, which is why he had made such an obscene amount of them, so if there were none of those here then cats were an unlikely possibility. It was a small comfort though.
“Please stand just right where you are,” Brad smiled at him, “Don't move a muscle.”
He was caught! Already! Damn that Eldo and his so called Lore.
The huge picture of the moustached face of Taz on the wall seemed to glower down at him, then its eyes lit up. A beam of light, a red shaft bathed Odo and then flicked back off. Brad looked down at a palantir on his desk then with his smile widening if that were possible without the top of his head falling off like a freshly opened boiled egg, he sad “Welcome back Odo Banks. We are sooo happy you choose to return to us.”
This was Odo's cue, he had been rehearsing all the way here, “Yes, well,” he began uncertainly then the words formed in his mind like a glowing line of troops marshalling from brain to lips in perfect order, “I always have found those others in that tatty old village to be, well you know, not all together respectable. They pay no heed to rules, talk willy-nilly about absolutely anything. Most of it complete nonsense. I had never realised before, until I was here, what a proper ordered society could be like.”
Brads smile defied biology and grew even wider, “I think you will be right at home here Mr Banks,” he said and pressed a button on his shiny desk. The entrance portal to the Dark Planet lit up and the door swished back into the wall, “Welcome home sir.”

Pretty backed up against the wall behind her then with a roar she charged at the wall opposite and crashed shoulder first into it and screamed in frustration. She sank to the floor of her small cube and grabbed her shoulder and pulled, there was a popping noise, she let out a hiss of air and then put her dislocated shoulder back in place.
A small slit hatch at the base of the wall to her right opened up, it was no more than six cm high. A small round tin plate with some sort of gruel on it was being cautiously prodded into the room. She manoeuvred herself until she had her back against the wall opposite the hatch and crouched low so she could see out. The pole which was slowly prodding the tin plate into her cube was at least five metres long and at the other end of it, also crouched down so he could see what he was doing was a leather clad guard, the visor on his helmet glinted distantly at her. Five metres this time, they were learning.
She waited until the tin plate was in the room and the pole had retreated back to the point where it was about to disappear out of the hatch, then using the wall to brace herself against she pushed and with all the muscles in thighs which had once won ten Highland Dancing competitions in a row and broken more than one lover through sheer over enthusiasm, she kicked the plate.
The plate shot back out the hole, it spun up onto the pole and hurtled along the length of it spinning like a dervish back towards the guard so fast it was making a high pitched whining noise. She heard a metallic 'ting' and the sound of shattering glass followed by a low moaning '”Arrrrrrrrgh'. She peered out the hatch just as it began closing, but just in time to see the guard writhing on the floor, his helmet glass shattered in pieces all around him and his hands clutching his bloodied face.
Pretty grinned to herself and went over to the mat which was her bed, with the nail on her middle finger she added, with a grunt of satisfaction, one more to the tally marks on the wall above her bed.

The double doors swished aside and revealed a huge circular room, almost a cathedral in height, with high black marble arches which met in curving sweeps far above Amarie's head as she entered. Before her were five stone pulpits on her left, five on her right and one in the middle.
Each of the pulpits on her left had a Council Member standing within it, but there were only four filled to her right, the empty one was hers. At the central pulpit, which was taller, wider and more ornate than the others was Taz, Overlord of the Dark Planet, or at least his representation. Taz was never seen himself, instead what stood in the pulpit was a projection held in a static magic field, projected from where she did not know. No one on the Council knew.
She stepped into the centre of the chamber, directly before the altars. A brilliant white light from somewhere in the ceiling above her pinpointed her. But she was a Council Member and she knew what to expect. The very observant might have noticed that blinding as the light was her pupils never changed, never dilated. They bore the light, they took it. And the very observant might have noticed that the nails on her right hand, which was clenched, were digging into her palms with enough force to draw blood as she exerted all her will to control her pupils, to remain defiant inwardly, remain in total control, even if she had to appease without. But there was no one so observant in the Council Chamber.
“Amarie, Council Member,” the image of Taz boomed out, his pulpit was fitted with magical amplifiers to help the effect, to create the all powerful, but Amarie had seen behind that curtain and a loud voice was not going to trouble her, “You are accused of aiding criminals to escape using Council magic. We have heard the mitigating circumstances but find them wanting. Do you have anything further to add?”
Amarie looked up at the slightly transparent face, “They were uncontrollable. They would not have conformed, they would have spread unrest, actively agitated others. This Council would have been forced into their expulsion sooner rather than later. My decision to help them, constrained even by force as I was, was still the right one. We are better without them than with.”
“That may be so,” Taz intoned, “But you do not have that authority. Expulsion is MY prerogative, MY duty, MY pleasure,” the voice roared and the image crackled and shimmered, “Further you have lost the opportunity to test my newest invention, the Extractor. They would have been the perfect candidates.”
'The extractor. This was something new,' Amarie thought. Taz often introduced new inventions to the Dark Planet, new surveillance devices like the Searchers, new ways to control. Well whatever this new one was at least the others were safe, whereever they were.
“Fortunately for you,” Taz went on, “We still have one of their number,” a flat palantir suspended on chains descended from the heights, it flickered into life. It showed Pretty in her cell she was booting her cube door with angry determination, “She is full of anger, hate, she is foul of mouth, quick to violence and morally loose, she is the perfect test subject. You can prove your loyalty and that you deserve your place among us on the Council by bringing her to the Experimentation Tower.”
Amarie's face betrayed nothing and her mouth said, “Of course. I will attend to it at once.” But within she was filled with a sudden dread.

Odo opened the door and exited out into the dark street on the Dark Planet. A surveillance Planet swung overhead, a light flickered over him and went off and it moved on. Well he had tried three of the four buildings with a light above their door and nothing. No sign of Pretty or Amarie. And he could get no word of them. The inhabitants were talkative enough on allowed subjects, even enthusiastic and knowledgeable. But as soon as he began to steer the conversation towards less safe ground their eyes would glaze over, or they would begin to act like he was not even there, staring straight through him, talking around him or over him. It was down right rude. It had never occurred to Odo you could have to much respectable behaviour, and there had always been a small part of him, a part he kept buried deep down, who had actually enjoyed listening to the leftest ramblings of old GB, and even those occasional nights in the Muck and Duck with Petty and Wisey, not that he would even admit it, but here, in this place, with all its starkness, he could not quite manage to deny it to himself.
He walked on down the street towards the last building that was open but just then there was the sound of tramping feet and a blaze of light, something was coming down the road behind him. He ducked into an alleyway between two dark buildings. His heart was racing as he peered out onto the street. There were five or six figures coming slowly towards him, they had something on wheels between them but the glare of the light made it difficult to discern. As the group drew closer he realised that Amarie was marching at the head of it, as they passed by his alley he saw five guards marched behind her and in between them, the thing on wheels, it was a frame and strapped to it with many thick chains was Pretty. Her mouth was gagged, which was no bad thing, and she was spread-eagled on the frame which was trembling continually under her efforts to rip free, but it was clear she was not going to. The group passed by and he was about to emerge and follow them when a second group came along behind, this was a slower moving group and at lest fifteen in number, some were being carried on stretchers by others and some were being supported by others, but none was unwounded, from bloody scratches made by expensively manicured nails, to ice packs on tender regions where four inches of studded heel had made their impression, there was a constant low moaning of pain from them. Odo crept out behind them and followed feeling every bit the hero and every bit terrified.

Shaking like a leaf Odo darted from alleyway to alleyway as the procession made its way through the city. Eventually the road widened out, there were three tall buildings dead ahead of them. The middle building was the tallest and was all darkness with no windows at all. The building on the left was the shortest of the three and the widest, carved above its ornate entrance were the words 'Council Chamber', the building on the right seemed to Odo's eye newer than the other two, its surface gleamed and was spotless and the red of the lettering emblazoned upon it seemed newly painted, it said 'Extraction Tower'. Odo did not like the sound of that, nothing respectable was ever extracted from anywhere respectable that was for certain.
The front group headed by Amarie stopped and the wounded guards stopped also, Odo ducked in behind the last building in he street. He was only feet away from the nearest of the guards who had been carrying a badly wounded comrade on a stretcher. They put the stretcher down whilst they were halted.
Distantly Odo could hear Amarie's voice, he could not quite make out the words but the tone was unmistakable, she was issuing orders. Soon the guards, Amarie and Pretty would all disappear into one of those towers, then what was he do? A sudden mad thought from the less respectable part of his subconscious emerged, something daring and adventurous. He resisted it, or he thought he was but much to his horror he realised he was creeping towards the guard on the stretcher. The bearers had moved further off, to hear what Amarie was saying. With a part of his brain looking on in sheer horror Odo watched himself strip the guard of helmet and jacket. He was certain any second Amarie would finish talking and the others would turn back and catch him red handed, or the wounded man would suddenly regain consciousness and start screaming, but still he continued to strip the body. Then barely able to believe he was doing it and with a feeling that he was floating somewhere outside of himself he rolled the guard off the stretcher and into the dark of the alleyway, slipped on the guards uniform and pulled the black helmet down over his face and got on the stretcher.

“We will proceed onto the Extraction Tower, you have your orders,” Amarie finished and waved at her group to move off bringing Pretty with them. By Eru she had just talked a lot of nonsense, but if she had hadn't Odo would surely have been caught, he was so slow, but at least he was easy to influence as he had been to detect. Some minds she could pick out of a crowd, some she recognised immediately but others screamed out at you, especially here in the controlled mind-scape of the Dark Planet. A mind full of fear, a mind terrified, a mind worried, and rather surprisingly as it turned out, a mind overly preoccupied with jelly, those were easy to pick out.
She had no idea what Odo was up to but at least this way he had not been caught yet. She had given orders all injured be given sleeping potions, to help them recuperate, that should put Odo out for at least a few hours, long enough for her to do what she had to do and to return to find him. The grand arched doors of the Tower of Extraction, twenty metres tall swished apart and she passed between them with Pretty rattling along behind.


Odo was roughly deposited on a hard bed, the two guards who had been carrying him turned to leave but just then a third guard arrived, “Change of orders,” the new guard said, “They went extra security over at the new tower. You two are it, I'll need to update your ID,” he said.
Odo tried to peer sideways out of the darkened visor to see what was going on, the two guards who had brought him in were having what looked like cards scanned by a palantir in the third guards hand, “there, that will get you in,” he said and left.
“Always us,” said one of the guards in a grumbling tone, “better get over there then.”
“Two minutes,” the other said, “ I need to go visit the little guards room.”
“Well hurry up or Taz will have us extracted next.”
Odo watched as one guard left the room, the other had his back to him. Slowly and quietly Odo sat up an swung his legs off the bed soundlessly. He slowly and quietly eased the helmet up over his head, his hands were shaking at the thoughts in his head. This was madness, but he had got this far, that very fact was making him brave, I was letting out that tiny part of Odo Banks that had always wanted to be the true hero. Buoyed up by his successes he lifted the helmet and with a swing of his arm cracked the other guard across his helmeted head.
A shock of vibration went through his arm on impact, the guards helmet cracked, but the guard was not knocked out as Odo expected but spun round instead partly crouched under the blow.
“I am so sorry, really I am,” Odo said and whacked the guard again, but still the guard did not go down,”Oh my!” Odo exclaimed as the guard leapt at him and they both fell backwards onto the bed, “Really this is a terrible misunderstanding,” Odo insisted and hit the guard with the helmet a third time, “Sorry, I am not usually like this,” Odo excused and hit the guard again but still the man struggled knocking the helmet from Odo's hand, “Oh dear!” Odo said and then his hand hit on something by the bedside, he couldn’t see what it was, fending off the guard as he was with his other arm but it felt pointy, he grabbed and swung it round, impaing the guard in the back, “I am dreafully sorry about this,” Odo apologised as the guard slumped over. A needle was sticking out the guards back its contents of sleeping potion however were emptied.
Odo removed the needle and put the guard in the bed and took his ID pass just as the other guard returned.
“What you doing?” the guard asked.
“Sleeping potion,” Odo replied fighting desperately to mimic the voice of the guard who lay in the bed.
“Right. We best get going.”
Odo nodded and they left for the Tower of Extraction.

Taz, or at least a ten metre high projection of him was waiting in the central chamber of the Tower of Extraction when Amarie entered with her prisoner. The room was circular and of the favoured black polished marble, it was otherwise empty but above her it stretched off into blackness, the entire centre of the tower was hollow it seemed. There was no sign of anything which could be the Extractor here that she could see, there was nothing at all except herself, her guards, Pretty in her harness and Taz.
“I have brought you the prisoner as ordered,” Amarie said.
“So I see,” the image of Taz replied.
“Where is this is Extractor you spoke of?” Amarie asked looking round.
“You are standing in it,” Taz replied, “It is my masterpiece.”
“What does it do?”
“It extracts of course. It purifies. It cleanses. It takes the best parts and casts out the foul. It takes away resistance. It removes defiance. It quells anger and breaks wills.”
Amarie remained silent. Behind her the doors swished open but it was only the extra guards Taz had sent for arriving, they joined the others lined at intervals around the circular walls of the chamber. One of them flashed in her mind, 'oh you idiot Banks,' she thought, 'what are you doing here?'
“Let us begin,” Taz said, “Lower the cats.”
“Cats?” Amarie queried surprised.
“They are the heart of my invention. Ruthless, uncontrollable, lawless. The magic attracts kind to kind, we will draw out of her every last drop of unruliness, every last violent tendency every hissing angry piece of her, we will draw it out, and when we have we will cast the poorer part of her into oblivion and keep what remains, the good, the lawful.”
Overhead a clanking of chains and a continually hissing, mewing, yowling grow in loudness as a metallic contraption descended. There must have been hundreds of cats in there from the sound of it, in something which looked like a huge box but of some transparent material so the cats could be seen crammed into it, fighting over one another, attacking the sides. Copper rods went from it and disappeared in the darkness of the high ceiling. Magic crackled and sparked from their fur, massive amounts of it which Amarie reeled before as it poured over her in waves.
There was a very loud sneeze, loud enough to echo round the chamber amplified till it drowned out the cats, it was followed by another even louder sneeze, and another, then a whole series of sneezes and one of the guards was all but doubled up- with a moment of horror Amarie realised it was Odo.
“Bring him here,” Taz barked indicating Odo. Two of the other guards grabbed Odo by the arms and marched him forward, he did not resist he was to busy sneezing. As the guards let him go he wrenched off the helmet and collapsed on the floor, his nose and eyes were streaming, “I need jelly,” he managed between sneezes, “rasberry!”
A light flashed from Taz's eyes and scanned Odo, “So not so law abiding as he seemed. Come to rescue his friend no doubt. Well now he can take her place, as the first to be Extracted. Put him in the centre of the chamber.”
Odo was frogmarched into the centre of the room where there was a circle etched into the marble floor and Amrie was helpless to prevent it. As soon as the guards had deposited him and stepped back out of the circle it lit up, a pale red light enclosed Odo within, “I say!” he managed between sniffs.
“Now behold the Extractor at work!” Taz proclaimed.
The walls of the Tower began to glow a dull green, then they started to move, the walls began to spin, the light grew in intensity and the cats howled.
Lightening, green lightening, sparked from the whirling walls as they spun into a blur, Amarie felt sick, the magic was building up in huge quantities, the reeling walls made her feel like she too was spinning, spinning on the spot. Then suddenly the walls stopped.
The magic earthed straight into the centre of the chamber and engulfed Odo who writhed and screamed so that Amarie had to turn away. She heard above the tempest of magic Taz laughing and a terrible sound, a sound like tearing flesh. Then there was silence.
She turned back, preparing herself for some new horror. But Odo was still there, only now there was another version of him, similar but with a face that looked like a mask had been torn to reveal something more dangerous beneath.
“What have you done?” she said in wonder.
“What I said I would do,” Taz replied, “I have extracted the rebellious side, the secret desires, what remains is self righteous, pious and will obey the rules. Indeed he will desire rules, order, respectability more than ever, free of his baser self.”
Amarie stepped closer, staring in disbelief at the two figures in the chamber who were staring equally disbelievingly at each other.
“Odo?” Amarie said slowly. The original Odo turned to look at her with a baffled but placid look on his face, she addressed the other version, “Odo?” She repeated, the new face turned to look at her, “No,” it said slowly as if coming to a realisation, then the face broke into a charming, seductive grin, “Hello there, I'm Orwell. You doing anything later?”

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Post by Eldorion Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:08 am

That explains so much! Shocked And I did not see that coming until just before the very end. Brilliant stuff Petty, you continue to nail the dramatic depiction of Forumshire with each update. lol!
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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:41 am

Amarië wrote:I have been home with the kids today, so I sat down and thought of all the nice stories and spin-offs that has come about here and figured: what the heck, why don't I just open a page and see if I can think of something that ambassador Amarië might do on an average day in Needlehole. And this is what came out, so... well... here it is, whatever it is. Poor grammar and all. Random is a key word, and I'll probably suffer from fic posters remorse in the morning. Laughing

(Sorry for interupting Kafria's story.)

-------------------------------------------------

The main street of Needlehole were buzzing with people as usual. Amarië hummed a old Fjordlandian walking tune while trying not to get run down by carts overloaded with cabbage and potatoes...

...With a small cough she freed her hand from the shield and put it on the floor, emblem up. There were ashes and chocolate chips all over it. She gave her shield arm a bit of a shake, before she sat down by the desk and took out some unmarked paper, bought in Bree-land. She wrote for a minute or two, then folded the paper in two and went to find her cloak of sneakiness.

Later that day a letter signed Mr Underhill would be found at the Police station next door, voicing a concern that the wanted criminal Spammy “cookie grabber” Botson might be at work adding explosives to Needlehole's cookies and cakes. By that time the shield was cleaned and returned to it's place on the wall. Lily would have reached chapter 7 with a blush on her cheeks, blissfully unaware of what has taken place, and Amarië would be on flipping through newspaper nr. 5 while drinking her coffee, humming an old walking tune from Fjordlandia.

------------

Mmm.... I just kew it... Suspect

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:42 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:I have been resisting taking part in this preferring just to read and enjoy everyone elses writing for once, but I just can't resist any longer, sorry. So here's my take on the day...

...It Odo watched as the Scotshobbit dashed towards the pub- a sight he had seen many times before usually about opening hour. To the left the Dark Planet was swooping down, its maw growing ever wider, the air whistling in a wind around it so that at its edges the fire seemed tinged with streaks of red flame but Petty got to the ground between it and the pub first and held up a defiant hand to it, index finger pointing at it in a meaningful way as the huge shape tore down towards him.
Even at this distance Odo could clearly hear the words ringing out loud, an ancient Scotshobbit challenge, clear and full of angry crabbit, “Yi're claimed” it said.
The Dark Planets huge mouth gaped, it swept towards Petty who seemed like a tiny dot before it, itmet the ground a hundred yards before him its lower jaw furrowing up the earth and grass in a huge pile before it as it came, the ground heaved and rippled but somehow still Petty held his ground and remained standing in its way and then the pub, its pond, startled duckies and Petty were all gone and there was nothing but a momentary horrified silence..........to be continued.

Read this again too.... cyclops

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 5:54 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Thanks Amarie. Your wish is my command. (That way I can blame you afterwards!)


Odo's mouth fell wide open in gaping horror, making his head even longer than usual and had an observer for the Guinness Book of records been there with a measuring tape probably have got him an entry for longest face....

... “So what was the plan we came up with again?” Petty asked.
“We didn't,” Odo replied without taking his stricken gaze from their closing impending doom,”we just stood here talking same as we always do in a crisis.”
“Ahh. Bugger.”

To be continued, probably.


Very Happy

“And besides I don't know about her,” he went on with an air of disapproval, “I am not sure she is entirely respectable, she was round Our Lady's protesting that we should not teach the girls that Eru created the world one morning whilst in the bath. Where as we all know from Sunnendei School even a Supreme Being like Eru cant resist having a little sing song. She wanted us to teach some science nonsense instead about tortoises turning into hobbits over time.”

This is why I could never vote for Kafria. Suspect

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:01 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:Glad you are enjoying it Eldo- you make your debut in it shortly (not this next bit but the bit after that).

“Here it comes!” Odo screamed as the air howled as it was wrenched apart by the incoming Dark Planet....

...“Maybe we could try reasoning with them,” Odo suggested and there was a huge roar that was like a whole ocean being tipped on their heads and everything went black.......and out of it faintly came the echo of Odo's voice saying, “I told you it was just putting us back in another cliffhanger situation...”

“These things are very important my love,” Odo replied, “but yes perhaps now is not the time. But I shall be looking into it at the first opportunity.”

The girl stuck out her tongue at him and said, “I set off the fireworks,” she smiled proudly and added, “one went right up its nose.”


Laughing

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:15 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:This part got a little out of hand, its twice as long as previous installements, sorry. Embarassed

…....Petty's head swam, he opened his eyes but instead of the usual blur most of it was in focus. This was immediately worrying, it was possible he was in danger of becoming sober. What his newly sharpened eyes had focused on was an immense poster that had been placed above the bed he was lying on. It read “Welcome citizen! Questions are a disease to the mind.' So he wasn't dead then, probably. Dead people surely weren't this thirsty.“...

... Rule 450- Cheese is popular and comes in many varieties. Cheese therefore can be a contentious subject. For the good of all you must never discuss cheese,” replied the palantir.

It would be funny if it all wasn't so close to the truth! Shocked

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:25 am

Kafria wrote:...Freya read the scroll through twice, eyes skimming the flowing lines, before allowing it to re-curl and fall to the ground. She lifted a hand and caressed the side of the drinking bowl, before dipping a finger inside and testing the temperature. She scooped the herbs floating on the surface aside with a bark ladle and lifted the bowl to her face. Taking a deep breath to inhale the fragrant scents, she paused for a moment before sipping the soothing draft.

...Freya nodded and the two turned away from each other and hurriedly began to break camp. Alone they were vulnerable and the Howe was a two day journey hence.

NB
Cimmerian adjectiv -1. Classical Mythology . of, pertaining to, or suggestive of a western people believed to dwell in perpetual darkness.
2. very dark; gloomy: deep, Cimmerian caverns.

The Tasmanian devil (Sarcophilus harrisii) is a carnivorous marsupial of the family Dasyuridae,

Schwarzwald – Black Forest

Fjell –mountain Brann – fire (according to a crude search)


Amazing story. What is it about people here? Everyone manages to write well. I personally hate ther competition.... Mad

...The Tasmanian devil (Sarcophilus harrisii) is a carnivorous marsupial of the family Dasyuridae... I hear the Bankses of Ozhobbitstan weren't the descendants of a tortoise --- no, they came from Tasmania I hears.... Shocked

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:32 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:...“Where is he?” Kafria asked fretfully drumming her fingers in a military rhythm on the table. The street outside was all but dark. One light fizzled and crackled above the doorway of the building they were in, a door through which Petty would come, if he came at all. Apart from anything else from the outside it looked like a pub. But there was no drink to be bought, or music to be sung or tales to be heard in here. Its few patrons were silent, musing over the rules and had long since been subdued into silence and apathy by the Dark Planets turgid atmosphere...

...Amarie stepped back into the shadow of the alleyway from which she had emerged but Petty could still just see her, she opened a small bag that she had left lying there and took out a single bottle of buckie. Petty stared at it dumbfounded, “Would you bow for this?” Amarie asked with a smile.
As if in a trance Petty followed her into the dark of the alleyway.

There is a lot of truth in this tale, I see. Nod

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:40 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:“Maybe he went somewhere else,” Kafria said straining to see out of the window and through the darkness outside.
“Petty never did have a good sense of direction,” GB commented, “He never could find his way home to his barrel of a night.”...

...They hurried along the street as best they could, Wisey was barely conscious seemingly drained by the misery of the poetry he had been forced to endure. They were less than half way back when three emerged from an alleyway further ahead, it was Petty and with him was Ringdrotten and a female elf unknown to them. But just as the two groups converged a bright light pinpointed them and a voice came out of the darkness above them, it said “Stay exactly where you are. You are under arrest for conspiracy.”

This tale is wonderfully good, Petty. Gotta say it.

Mirabella ran over to him, hugging her relative close, “Wisey are you ok?” she asked.
Wisey stirred and stared up at them, his eyes were full of tears, “Help me!” he said weakly, “This is Channeling gone wrong. It's killing me.”


Brought a tear to my eye...

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 6:52 am

Kafria wrote:And now-

The small grey pony came to a standstill, mud-caked hooves slipping in the sticky ground. Checking the wheels of the cart Freya found a large stone step blocking the way. She lifted her tunic, crouching slightly and setting her shoulder against the wooden rail that enclosed their belongings. Rue took her place by the animals head, a firm hand near the harness and the looping slack of the rope gathered in her free hand....

...“The Howe is a haven and anyway, needs must,” Freya said. “Now enough chat. I won’t be doing anything if we don’t find those plants.”

Very different take from Petty's I must say. Intriguing stuff, Kafria. Witchy stuff - and you a Science Teacher... Laughing

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 7:11 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:...

...That's easy,” Eldo replied, “I can do that from here with the Lore I have. They welcome people through the front door with open jaws at the Dark Planet. If you're foolish enough to walk through them.”
“Thank Eru we're sending a fool then,” Petty murmured under his breath.

Laughing

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Post by Orwell Wed Mar 07, 2012 7:22 am

Kafria wrote:... Rue shivered and clutched her knees tight to her chest, striving to contain the small amount of heat still trapped by her arms, as she sat on the rim of the Howe. The cloud blanket of the last few days had fled and high above the stars decorated the vast expanse, letting the worst of the voids chill in. Behind on the greenway the pony cropped grass, contentedly tethered near their cart and makeshift camp. A tremor fled down her back as she gazed beyond to the dark shadows encased in branches, who knew what could be concealed there, creeping ever closer. She hoped Freya was right about the Howe providing protection, they would need it if anyone found them out here, and she was sure they would, with the hollow lit up like a beacon...


Flame raced around the rim, linking the four quadrant fires as it shot high in the sky. Each of the men threw up their arms and staggered backwards; a rush of wind pummelled them as clouds rushed up and released a deluge onto them. They turned and fled into the forest. The flames dropped away and the clearing calmed. Haven!

Rue watched them go, waiting until they were out of sight before turning to greet their rescuer.

So what do you think? think I may have gone a bit ott with the magic bit. And can you figure out who the rescuer is? His name is Taranis if thats any help Very Happy

Not bad at all, Kafria. Your prose gets tighter every time I read your stuff. Very Happy

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