Merry Christmas - 2017

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Post by malickfan Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:24 pm

bungobaggins wrote:
malickfan wrote:So um, is it normal for a 'friend' to exchange about two dozen texts with you over two days discussing a simple meet up, end almost every text with a emoticon or smiley and then apologise for asking so many questions? Suspect scratch  

We've known each for just under a month and have only met maybe five times previously in total, she told me she doesn't generally socialise that much so perhaps she is just nervous or excited that someone new is willing to talk to her about stuff? or just she just want to gauge my personality a bit better?

I wouldn't read too much into that. Especially the emojis, don't read into the use of emojis (except if she's sending you kissy faces or hearts, then it's pretty clear what's going on). The worst thing you can do right now is over-complicate things, or jump the gun. Definitely be aware of her body language during the "date", though. But don't make it look like you're focusing on it. This is just something that comes with practice.

OK, my phone is so shit and cheap (paid like £8-10 for it Laughing but it gets the job done) so I can't actually read or text most emojis but we've exchanged lots of (^_^), yeah I'm definitely not trying to read too much into anything at this point, will just try to relax and have fun tomorrow.

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Post by Amarië Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:37 pm

She simply sounds nervous imo. Just try to keep your shoulders down and have fun with your new friend, like you said. Friendship is wonderful.

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Post by halfwise Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:11 pm

malickfan wrote:So um, is it normal for a 'friend' to exchange about two dozen texts with you over two days discussing a simple meet up, end almost every text with a emoticon or smiley and then apologise for asking so many questions? Suspect scratch  

We've known each for just under a month and have only met maybe five times previously in total, she told me she doesn't generally socialise that much so perhaps she is just nervous or excited that someone new is willing to talk to her about stuff? or just she just want to gauge my personality a bit better?

She seems to like you, but forget you know that. Just nod your head at the fact you don't have to be nervous and get on with it. At this point, ALL it means is you don't have to be nervous. If you're relaxed she'll take it from there, where ever 'there' is. Leave that as a mystery.

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Post by Eldorion Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:27 pm

It can be difficult determining whether someone likes you as a friend or likes you as potentially something else, especially if you're both nervous and outside of your comfort zones, which is what it sounds like. I'd advise against assuming that there's anything more going on than just hanging out as friends; certainly not at this point. You don't want to psych yourself out but also there's nothing wrong with being "just" friends since those kinda relationships have a lot of value.
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Post by David H Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:14 pm

Eldorion wrote: also there's nothing wrong with being "just" friends since those kinda relationships have a lot of value.

Yep, friendships are important and amazing things. They've gotten me through some hard times, and I've tried to pay them back when I can. You can't have too many friends Nod (except maybe on facebook Rolling Eyes ). Then, every once in awhile, they magically grow into other things....

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Post by azriel Sun Jan 14, 2018 10:58 am

A friendship can last forever & feels like a "hand in a glove". When all else goes belly up having a friend there really helps, even if they don't say anything, knowing they are there is all you need. You don't always get that from a lover ?

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Post by Mrs Figg Sun Jan 14, 2018 1:11 pm

malickfan wrote:
Forest Shepherd wrote:If she doesn't like Tolkien I don't know if there's much of a future in it. That's okay for now, but just saying...

If she likes The Hobbit films, I'm going to call off the whole thing Nod



I should hope so too. Mad
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Post by Mrs Figg Sun Jan 14, 2018 1:16 pm

malickfan wrote:
Eldorion wrote:
Forest Shepherd wrote:If she doesn't like Tolkien I don't know if there's much of a future in it. That's okay for now, but just saying...

Things to say to your date when you're a Tolkien fan:

Merry Christmas - 2017 - Page 10 7RLKc7Tl

I'm still not entirely sure if this a casual date or a date date, I just asked her if she wanted to hang out as friends and shes seems pretty keen, but I'm not going to make any stupid or sudden romantic moves as she's as inexperienced as me, I'll wait and see how it goes then talk to her properly afterwards, I'll be happy remaining friends and if we do decide to go down the romantic route I'm going to take things as slowly as she is comfortable with and it will be an entirely mutual decision, I will probably only be able to hang out at weekends though, so it probably makes sense to be careful and take things slowly.

(Of course, that's assuming she even wants to see me again, not actually nervous (well, a bit) just a bit baffled that I've landed myself in this situation after all these years, never really had a date casual or otherwise, though I have hung out with platonic female friends many times).


if you get nervous just imagine us invisible and protecting you, bit like when Sirius, Lupin and James and Lily Potter come back to protect Harry before the battle. Only try not to think too much about whats under Petty's kilt, and you should be ok. Wink
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Post by Mrs Figg Sun Jan 14, 2018 1:25 pm



ok ok if that doesn't work imagine the Queen letting a big one off.
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Post by Norc Sun Jan 14, 2018 5:24 pm

malickfan wrote:So um, is it normal for a 'friend' to exchange about two dozen texts with you over two days discussing a simple meet up, end almost every text with a emoticon or smiley and then apologise for asking so many questions? Suspect scratch  

We've known each for just under a month and have only met maybe five times previously in total, she told me she doesn't generally socialise that much so perhaps she is just nervous or excited that someone new is willing to talk to her about stuff? or just she just want to gauge my personality a bit better?

there are about a million videos on youtube about not overthinking/over analyzing things.. try that.
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Post by Forest Shepherd Sun Jan 14, 2018 6:36 pm

It's important to not be too self-absorbed: spending a lot of time thinking about what other people think about you, that sort of thing. It can be a kind of selfishness that keeps you from recognizing when other people are hurting and need your help. And selfishness can't be a good trait to be emphasizing at the beginning of any kind of relationship, surely.

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Post by malickfan Sun Jan 14, 2018 7:28 pm

Hey guys my sort of but not really a date today went really really well Very Happy, we walked around town for a few hours talking about constantly about everything and anything (and flirting a bit...), she's a bit of a sheltered geek like me and is going through similar issues in her personal life, we clicked straight away as friends and it felt like I'd known her a lot longer, she's only around 18 months younger than me (and very attractive) and texted me afterwards today was great and that she had really enjoyed herself.

Went and watched the new Jumanji movie as well which was surprisingly good and kept her giggling all the way through (me too actually, Jack Black was hilarious as the avatar of a self absorbed teenager it girl trapped in a fat middle aged guys body), she insisted on buying the tickets though despite my attempts to be the gentleman. Mad Laughing

We did briefly discuss where we saw this going, and neither of us wants to rule out a relationship Shocked but we've agreed to take things very slow and get to know each other better as friends before we even think about going down that route, even if we don't she seems an awesome girl so far, and I think I've got the beginning of a great friendship developing, she has a part time job with erratic hours and I'm busy during the weekdays but we've made tentative plans to meet up again soon. I was pleasantly surprised how calm I was, just acted myself.

PS She has seen the LOTR films (even the Ralph Bakshi one) , read The Hobbit and seen AUJ she's not a hardcore fans but said she enjoyed them, though I did my civic duty as a citizen of Forumshire and warned her off the other Hobbit films Nod

Very Happy cheers :carrot:


Last edited by malickfan on Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:05 pm; edited 1 time in total

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The Thorin: An Unexpected Rewrite December 2012 (I was on the money apparently)
The Tauriel: Desolation of Canon December 2013 (Accurate again!)
The Sod-it! : Battling my Indifference December 2014 (You know what they say, third time's the charm)

Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by malickfan Sun Jan 14, 2018 7:29 pm

Mrs Figg wrote:
malickfan wrote:
Forest Shepherd wrote:If she doesn't like Tolkien I don't know if there's much of a future in it. That's okay for now, but just saying...

If she likes The Hobbit films, I'm going to call off the whole thing Nod



I should hope so too. Mad

She's only seen the first one but liked it, I can just about forgive her for that I suppose... Laughing

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The Thorin: An Unexpected Rewrite December 2012 (I was on the money apparently)
The Tauriel: Desolation of Canon December 2013 (Accurate again!)
The Sod-it! : Battling my Indifference December 2014 (You know what they say, third time's the charm)

Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by malickfan Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:06 pm

Mrs Figg wrote:Only try not to think too much about whats under Petty's kilt, and you should be ok. Wink

No

I imagine that's even more terrifying than what is under Professor Quirrel's turban

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The Tauriel: Desolation of Canon December 2013 (Accurate again!)
The Sod-it! : Battling my Indifference December 2014 (You know what they say, third time's the charm)

Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by Forest Shepherd Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:17 pm

Well done!

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Post by malickfan Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:21 pm

Forest Shepherd wrote:Well done!

Smugdog :brows: pub Embarassed

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Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by Norc Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:34 pm

hoooraaah!
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Post by malickfan Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:57 pm

malickfan wrote:...I've never been on a date in my life and I don't expect that to change anytime soon Sad  Suspect Embarassed (and if by some weird miracle or chance it did happen, I'd be so weirded out and terrified I'd probably screw things up anyway Sofa )

Perhaps a bit premature to classify it as a date, but wow, things have certainly changed in the last two weeks... Laughing Shocked

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Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by Mrs Figg Sun Jan 14, 2018 11:05 pm

Thumbs Up  sounds cool
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Post by azriel Mon Jan 15, 2018 12:24 am

Great stuff Malick !!! Sounds like you really enjoyed yourself & feel a better man Cheerleader

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Post by azriel Mon Jan 15, 2018 12:25 am

Mrs Figg wrote:

ok ok if that doesn't work imagine the Queen letting a big one off.

When that tablecloth flew............................ slap laugh oh, I was gone man !

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Post by Bluebottle Mon Jan 15, 2018 12:34 am

malickfan wrote:
malickfan wrote:...I've never been on a date in my life and I don't expect that to change anytime soon Sad  Suspect Embarassed (and if by some weird miracle or chance it did happen, I'd be so weirded out and terrified I'd probably screw things up anyway Sofa )

Perhaps a bit premature to classify it as a date, but wow, things have certainly changed in the last two weeks... Laughing Shocked

they have a tendencey to do if you let them Nod

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Post by halfwise Mon Jan 15, 2018 1:02 am

Good deal Malick. Just go with it, let it happen as it will.

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Post by Eldorion Mon Jan 15, 2018 3:02 am

I'm really glad to hear things went so well, Malick! Very Happy Congrats and best wishes for things continuing to look up more often than not. Nod
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Post by halfwise Mon Jan 15, 2018 3:56 am

Well Malick, at this point probably the best thing we all can do is to bugger off and leave you to your own devices.

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