Eldo's parodies

'Your movie-making is known to us,' said Galadriel, looking at Bilbo. 'But it has no place here. Yet not in vain will it prove, maybe, should you leave this land and not seek aid here, as Gandalf himself plainly purposed. For though the Lord of the Galadhrim is accounted the wisest of the Elves of Middle-earth, and a giver of gifts beyond the power of kings, he would not let you stray so far from your purpose. He has dwelt in the West since the days of dawn, and I have dwelt with him years uncounted; for ere the fall of Nargothrond or Gondolin I passed over the mountains, and together through ages of the world we have fought the long defeat against those who would corrupt the very stories they claim to adapt.

'I it was who first summoned the White Council. And if my designs had not gone amiss, it would have been a record in history, and not told in any tale of Latter Days, and then mayhap we should see our stories adapted faithfully. But even now there is hope left. I will not act in this movie, my character where she should not be, or saying things she never said. For not in changing or adding, nor in mixing this line and that scene, can I avail; but only in staying true to the book at the heart of this all. But this I will say to you: your Movie stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail, to the ruins of all. Yet hope remains while all the Film-makers are true.'

'Tell me,' said Pippin, 'is there any hope? For Bilbo, I mean, in his new movie?'

Gandalf put his hand on Pippin's head. 'There never was much hope,' he answered. 'Just a fool's hope, as I have been told. And when I heard of Peter Jackson--' He broke off and strode to the window, as if his eyes could pierce the night in New Zealand. 'Peter Jackson!' he muttered. 'Why that director, I wonder?' He turned. 'Just now, Pippin, my heart almost failed me, hearing that name.'

Eldorion wrote:Would Galadriel agree with the purists? Of course she'd be on our side! Just look at this fragment found in Tolkien's old laundry hamper, apparently written in response to a now-lost letter proposing to "expand" The Hobbit to make it more like TLotR. Tragically, it was lost amidst the good Professor's dirty underwear for several decades and has only now been found, in a second-hand clothing store....

'Your movie-making is known to us,' said Galadriel, looking at Bilbo. 'But it has no place here. Yet not in vain will it prove, maybe, should you leave this land and not seek aid here, as Gandalf himself plainly purposed. For though the Lord of the Galadhrim is accounted the wisest of the Elves of Middle-earth, and a giver of gifts beyond the power of kings, he would not let you stray so far from your purpose. He has dwelt in the West since the days of dawn, and I have dwelt with him years uncounted; for ere the fall of Nargothrond or Gondolin I passed over the mountains, and together through ages of the world we have fought the long defeat against those who would corrupt the very stories they claim to adapt.

'I it was who first summoned the White Council. And if my designs had not gone amiss, it would have been a record in history, and not told in any tale of Latter Days, and then mayhap we should see our stories adapted faithfully. But even now there is hope left. I will not act in this movie, my character where she should not be, or saying things she never said. For not in changing or adding, nor in mixing this line and that scene, can I avail; but only in staying true to the book at the heart of this all. But this I will say to you: your Movie stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail, to the ruins of all. Yet hope remains while all the Film-makers are true.'

Eldorion wrote:Musings on adaptation...

'Tell me,' said Pippin, 'is there any hope? For Bilbo, I mean, in his new movie?'

Gandalf put his hand on Pippin's head. 'There never was much hope,' he answered. 'Just a fool's hope, as I have been told. And when I heard of Peter Jackson--' He broke off and strode to the window, as if his eyes could pierce the night in New Zealand. 'Peter Jackson!' he muttered. 'Why that director, I wonder?' He turned. 'Just now, Pippin, my heart almost failed me, hearing that name.'

From J.R.R. Tolkien, "The Siege of My Books", The Secret History of Middle-earth, Volume VIII.